Prednisone, Anyone?

Howdy, all!

Hope you are all recovered from Thanksgiving and Black Friday and are looking forward to Christmas (yay!) and the fresh New Year to come.  God, I hope it's a better year all around.  I'm having to go down on my Prednisone or the bariatric surgeon won't operate on me due to increased infected risk.  I can see his point and he wants my odds of success to be as high as they can be, but God....oh, dear God am I suffering.  If anyone ever offers you Prednisone, JUST SAY NO!  I wish I would have about 5 years ago when I was started on it when I was having a bad flare of my rheumatoid arthritis and nothing else was working.  Now I'm stuck on the damn stuff and can't function at the 10mg I was started on way back when.  I've been on 20mg a day for about two years and when I got down to the 10mg (following my rheumy's advice) I could hardly get out of bed.  I walked like the tin soldier and every joint in my body just ached.  After consulting Dr. Schranz (my nice mother-in-law!) we think I took too much of a jump from 20 to 10 so now I'm on 15mg.  I feel a little better.  At least I can walk for a longer time, but I can't stand at all now.  All my weight is up front and pulls on my lower back when I stand and oh, my dear God, it hurts SO bad!  It's those moments that keep me going and thinking that the surgery is worth the going down on the Prednisone and all the misery that it entails.  Boy, I've got myself in such a bind and gaining all this weight is my own stupid fault!!  I promise, God, if you will help me get thin again I WON'T mess it up!!

My husband is not doing too much better.  He is having problems with vomiting about 2-3 times a day now.  And really BIG, LARGE amounts!  We've had him try everything: tea, toast, eating small meals several times a day and the list goes on.  Even his anti-nausea medication isn't working anymore.  I've asked him if he's stressed about anything and he says no, but sometimes you can be worrying about things and not even know it. It lurks below the surface.  I just don't know what to do.  Luckily he has a doc's appointment coming up.  He may need to see a gastro doctor.  We shall see.

Nothing else going on.  We're just survivin' the best we can.  I go on the computer and go on "blog hops" a lot to get my mind off things and how awful I feel.  It really does help and you meet a lot of new and interesting people by "following" their blogs.  If you got a blog, try the two blog hops I have up currently in my left sidebar.  I highly recommend them!

Thank you so very much for all your sweet comments and advice.  My Thanksgiving post had 9 comments...wow!  That is the most I had EVER!!  So keep 'em coming.  I love knowing what you guys are thinking and feeling.  Don't be shy!!

To end this post I'll put in another one of my poems and a pretty picture.  I hope you guys are liking this new feature I'm doing.  :0)

 A Friend Is A Friend

You always were so cheery and bright
I would sit back to see you succeed through the day
And sit in gloom as you would shine through the night.
You always knew where you want to be,
Who you are and how to get there;
You even tried to show me.

A friend is a friend is a friend.
Someone who is there
To love and cherish
A friend is someone who'll always care.
A friend is a friend is a friend
Someone who is true
And loves through every trial
To talk to when you are blue.
A friend loves you through it all
Through good times and bad
And they even pick you up when you fall.
A true friend is a person you can't easily forget
All the times shared are stuck in your mind
And all those times you will never regret.

When I first thought of leaving
I shook my head
Not knowing what I was believing.
I will keep you close to my heart
For always and eternity
As I wake up today for a new start.
Don't be sad for me not being here, friend of mine,
Don't cry nor weep but do one last thing for me-
Let that internal light that was always there shine.  

This photo was taken by my soon-to-be stepmom, Gina.  She is an awesome photographer. This picture was taken in Oklahoma, where she lives.  Please stop by her blog and say hi and that Missy sent ya!  She'll love it!!. Just click here to visit her KEWL blog!!     

That pretty much does it!  Wish me luck on my doctor's appointment tomorrow.  I'm gonna give her an earful about the Prednisone.  Heck, she probably runs screaming for the hills when she knows I'm coming! Ha!

Have a great night!
God bless!

Singin' The Prednisone Blues

Hello, everyone!!!

As the title post says, I am definitely singing the predensione blues.  This week I'm on 10mg a day, which is half of the 20 mg I was on before.  It takes me about one hour to get from the bedroom to the bathroom in the morning, right when I first get up.  Thank God for the narrow hallways, as I hold on to both sides to give me support down the hall.  Then in the sink I lean on that to wash my face and brush my teeth.  What is so amazing to think about was I was on 10mg a day about 3 years ago and felt fine!  But then I started gaining weight and that is what really put added strain on my bones and joints.  I have no one to blame but ME!!  I wish I could go back in time and not have gained that weight.  But as they say, hind sight is ALWAYS 20/20.  How true!!
I guess I'm "paying the piper" like my dad always said!!  And what a piper to play!!

As you all may know, I recently received "The Sylish Blogger Award."  Here are some of the lucky blogs I blessed the award with.  Some have chosen to receive it and put it on their blog, and others have not.  It's their choice.  Please stop by their sites and show their blog some love!! :0)  Here's the list:

My Life In A Blog  This is one of my favorite blogs.  Not because Gina is my dad's girlfriend, but because I like her as a person and her blog shows her hard work!  :0)

Looney Life - My Life As A Housewife and Mom
This is one of my dearest childhood friends that we found each other on Facebook and then on Blogger!  She has such a beautifully decorated blog, you should stop and see it.  She already decorated for Christmas, which is her (and mine!) favorite time of the year!!

A Real (Upstate) NY Housewife  This, too, is one of my favorite blogs.  Martha really says it like it is and I LOVE that in a person.  She is involved now in a campaign where you write a post a month for November and combining that with a letter campaign where you write letters to your parents, ex boyfriend/husband, to a stranger, ect.  The letters are very good!!  Stop by and see for yourself!!

Life And Fibromyalagia   I just love this blog by Heather!  She puts her whole heart and body into it and it shows!  She just recently had her mother die from complications of Alzheimer's disease was taking care of her at her childhood home.  And what a fine job Heather did considering she, herself, suffers from fibromyalgia.  All mother's should be as lucky to have such a devoted and caring daughter.  When you have a moment, stop by her site.

When Hello Means Goodbye
This is a cute site featuring Grayden, a precocious 2 year old that has completely filled the hearts of his adopted mom and dad.  The adoptive parents went through a horrible nightmare of losing an infant just moments after he was born.  Very sad story, but incredible blog.

OK, that is it for the award round-up, I will be giving out more soon to those sites I find adorable and educational!!  So watch out, I may be surprising you with the award!!

Now for the beautiful scenic picture.  Here goes:

This was taken when my mom, dad, me and Frankie went to the Wild Animal Park in Escondido, California.  We had so much fun on that trip and took so many pictures.  I love pictures - in case you didn't know that...LOL!!!!!!

Here's the poem I selected for this post.  I hope you like it:

The Conch          

I first saw the conch
When I was walking on the beach.
Just walking,
It came from nowhere
Going absolutely anywhere.
I looked and it was there.
I leaped forward
As I had never seen one before.
It was so beautiful,
And curved with an angels touch
I just knew it's sound would be perfect.
Calling anywhere to anyone,
Calling them to come join me
To make me happy,
To lessen my sorrow.
Yes, I wanted to hear it
So bad that it ached the
Edges of my heart.
I have called others before
But they are close
But yet far away.
Never there when I need them
But always home.
I need that conch
To reach a lonely heart
That matches my heart.
It will call far
And I will have a new and better chance.
As I reach down for the conch,
I am just brushing sand     
With fingertips.
It is like there was no conch
Only my silly dreams and
It is like I imagined it.
I stand up,
Heart broken for a moment
While a new wish fills my heart.
Someday I will have that conch
And it will bring me a love so deep
I never could have imagined.

Hope everyone has a great Saturday and Sunday.  Geez, it's so hard for me to think today what with having fibro fog and all.  And I just used some of my Polar Frost gel and got some of it in my eye!  Aye Carumba!!!!!  That BURNS!!

Have a great weekend!
God bless!

"Meet Me Monday" Blog Hop

Good Monday, everyone!
Well, we had a little repeat of what happened yesterday morning with Frankie vomiting in the morning but I did NOT have any diarrhea!  Yay!  We figured that maybe the oatmeal he has for breakfast is what is doing it.  Tomorrow he has an appointment with his pain specialist, so we'll see what he has to say about the matter.  Maybe it's a combination of meds and foods....who knows!!

OK!  Today is "Meet Me Monday" where you answer five questions about yourself and it's also a blog hop, too.  It sounded fun, so I decided to try it out here on my blog.  What an interesting way to get to know each other.  The button to join along with the blog hop is right up top on the right hand side bar.  I do hope that many will partake in this "getting to know you" blog hop.  So here goes:

QUESTIONS:

1.  Do you eat Sushi?
2.  What kind of bath soap do you use?
3.  How often do you talk to your Mom?
4.  What TV shows do you watch on a regular basis?
5.  Did you start Christmas shopping yet?

ANSWERS:

1.  Heck no!  I know my grandpa always told me to always try something first, then say I don't like it, but in this case, just looking at Sushi is enough to make me run for the exit door!
2.  I LOVE my Suave Lavender and Vanilla body wash.  I read somewhere Lavender is very soothing and I believe it.  When I've had a tough day, it's always nice to have a wonderful shower with my soothing body wash!
3.  When my mom was alive, I spoke with her every day.  I told her all my hopes and dreams and when I was upset or crying about something, she always knew how to make me feel better.  Oh, how I miss her so!  She died just a day past her 60th birthday and it's been hard to live without her and not talk to her anymore.  So all you out there that still have your mom, CHERISH HER!  You just don't know how long you will have her around.
4.  I used to be a big TV watcher, but over the past 2 years now I've been more into reading and using the computer.  When I did watch TV, I loved "Supernatural" (I have a gigantic high school girl crush on Jensen Ackles!), "King of Queens" and "Hell's Kitchen."  It always amazed me how the cooks could work under such pressure of Gordon Ramsey!
5.  No, I usually wait until the stores are TOTALLY packed on Christmas Eve.  Since my husband and I don't have a lot of money coming in, we all have decided to not get fancy, expensive gifts for each other.  My brother & sister-in-law didn't listen, though and got Frankie and I a brand new computer last year.  Not that I'm complaining.....heck no!  I LOVE our computer!!  :0)  I just felt bad that I couldn't get them something as nice in return.  They are always doing nice things for us.....I can't thank them enough!!  Frankie's folks are like that, too.  God bless them all!!


Alright, I answered the questions honestly and I will add my blog to the linky.  I do hope you all with blogs will participate.  It's fun!!!


I was tickled pink with all the sweet comments I received over my poem and picture yesterday.  So much, in fact, that I will do it again today as a special treat.  We all could use a relaxing picture and poem to unwind after a "manic Monday."  So kick off your shoes, sit back and relax with a nice drink and I hope you enjoy my selected picture and poem for today.

The picture I have selected for today is from our trip to Imperial Beach, CA.  This was right outside our motel room.  It was so nice to hear the lapping of waves while we relaxed in our room.  Too bad we couldn't have left it open overnight.  But with all the weirdos out, that wasn't an option.

The poem I have selected was written my senior year of high school.  I was going out with this guy, whom shall remain somewhat nameless, and I thought he liked me the same as I liked him.  But I knew better when he wanted me to "put out" more than I wanted to. The only thing he saw me as was a sex toy.  It still hurts to this day, and most of my poems written are regarding him and the pain he caused me.  He was my biggest love in school.

You Were Never There      

I never wanted to write this
Nor had I wanted our story to end.
I wanted, needed for it
To go on and on.
When we began
I saw no end.
But as time went on
As it always does,
The pages of our book
Thinned as they were turned.
Now the end has come
And it has gone.
It is time
You were never there.
Even when I could see you,
Touch you,
Your mind was off from me.
You were never there,
Even though you were right beside me.
You could not see me
Even when tears ran down my face.
You went on your way,
Leading me on a dead end road
Breaking my heart so much
Ripping it apart and throwing it away.
I found it without you,
You were never there.
It was lying far from where you are
And you didn't offer to mend it.
I can put the pieces back once again,                    
But it will take time.
I will never forget you
As you are unforgettable.
I may still want you back,
But I can never trust you
To have my heart.
I may wish, long for you
But you will never come to
Wipe the falling tears from my eyes.
I may wish for you near me
But it will never come to be.
You were never there before.
I may somewhere deep down
Still love you,
But I will not call you,
I will not see you,
I will not bother you.
Your love for me had died
As if it has ever lived.
I can call,
But you will never hear me.
You will never come.
I can look beside me
And see you there
But it was a trick my eyes played.
That place is empty-
You were never there
When I needed you most.

To Alex N., 1989

Thank you for reading my poems and liking them.  That means a lot to me.  Hope you are having a great Monday!!!

Until next post,
God bless you all!

Trapped Inside My Skin

Hi, my dear friends!
Can you believe it is already Sunday?  This week has just gone by so quickly.  Thanksgiving is just around the corner and then Christmas.....are we ready for all that?  :0)

My hubby and I started out Sunday with him puking and me a massive case of diarrhea.  Boy, we are high excitement over here!  We know how to live it down!!  The only thing I can think of that set it off was yesterday we had Chinese buffet (I couldn't go due to my leg was just killing me so my hubby brought home mine.  Isn't he sweet?) from one of our very nice friends and it was just one of those meals that keeps on giving.  I should have known because last night I had the heartburn from Hell and had so many Tums I feel like I could take stock in their company!  The heartburn finally went away and I fell asleep and woke up with the diarrhea.  What a day already!!

I just feel "trapped" inside my skin lately.  It is VERY, VERY sensitive to any kind of touch.  And don't even think of touching my shins.  I will let out a primal scream if you do!  They are so sensitive it is painful.  They are one of my fibro trigger points and it never goes away.  I mean, it lessens in sensitivity sometimes, but it's always there.  Hope that makes sense.  I also have the same kind of trigger points on my chest.  When Jack jumps up on the bed to snuggle, he likes to walk across my chest and it's all I can do to not scream.  I hate to push him away, but sometimes when those are really flaring, I have no choice to reposition him farther down my body.  Does anyone else have that kind of "trapped inside" your skin sensation?  It's horrible!  I want out!  Now!

Okay, before I go completely nuts (shut up to those who say I'm already there!) I want to share one of my poems and a pretty picture with you.  Every now and then I like to spruce up the blog by doing that.  I am hardly a poet, so if you don't like it, let me know.  I can make corrections.  Writing has always been an "outlet" for me, especially in those rough years of high school and college.  I've written 200 poems and some rhyme and a lot don't.  I'm one of those that believe that you don't need to rhyme to have a good poem.  Words just flow from your heart and seldom rhyme.  Do you talk in rhyme?  I don't think so!!  So every one of my poems is a masterpiece of my heart.

OK, OK, before I get too sappy, I'll show you the picture first.  It's just something to look at and make you feel calm and relaxed.  Or at least it does me.  I just LOVE the ocean, so I've got zillions of pictures.  My mom would tease me and say, "I believe you have EVERY  wave captured by your camera!"  You know what?  I think she is right!!!  I would take my camera with every time we would go to San Diego for our rheumatologist appointment. We would stop by the ocean and I'd get my pictures.  After all, you CAN'T go to California and NOT see the ocean!  I think there is some law about that....ha!  LOL! The picture I have chosen for today was taken in San Diego on Pacific Beach.  It shows the lifeguard station with a large USA flag billowing in the breeze.

Isn't that pretty? I just adore Mission and Pacific Beaches.  They are so vastly different, what with Pacific Beach having the pier that is actually a motel.  "Sleep Over The Ocean" is written on the side of the pier.  I kept telling Mom and Grandma that we should check into that.  I always got the same answer......"I wish!"  Yeah, it is pretty expensive.  But a girl can dream, right?  :0)  Now for the poem.  Hope you like it!

Only Then Shall I Be Saved

Look down upon me, Lord
See me as you did when I was first born
See me as white as snow-
My gown not a wrinkle to be seen
Look down upon me with love, Lord
For only then shall I be saved.
Oh, I know my slate is not clean
I have sinned today.
But I love you, Lord
And you say you love me
You say you can forgive
And forget.
Look down upon me-
Only then shall I be saved.
I want to feel you again
And live in glory.
I miss you, Lord.
It is I who walked away,
It is I who gave in to hardships,
It is I who have sinned.
It is You who stand before me with open arms;
Arms that are ready to receive me.
Please don't look away,
Like I have done,
But look upon me with love and forgiveness;
Only then shall I be saved.

Hope you enjoyed the new "feature" to my blog.  Every Sunday I'll do this: have a pretty picture and poem for you to enjoy.  I've been getting lots of positive feedback about my pictures.  Thank you, friends, for being so supportive!!  You have a lovely Sunday and relax....for tomorrow is Monday!

God bless you all!
Until next post,