Howdy, everyone!
As the title of this post reads, I definitely have "familiar feelings" today as this is the day I have to go to yet ANOTHER seminar about the Lap-band or Realize band procedure. And they couldn't have picked a busier hospital than Good Sam in downtown Phoenix! I'm worried about parking and how far I will have to walk to even get to the conference room. I've had MAJOR problems with walking lately. My right leg has just been incredibly painful with "pins and needles" in my foot, muscle spasms in my calf and thighs, and let's not forget that lovely "shooting" pain I get from my lower back. This morning it took me about 15 minutes (and me having to stop and lean against the wall to work out severe cramps in my thigh) to walk down the short hall to the bathroom. And then back into the bedroom so I could take my morning cocktail of medications. Please work fast!!!
Yesterday I went to the podiatrist and he gave me a clean bill of health - for just my left foot! The pain I was having in the arch is completely gone. So either that lovely moon boot or the steroid shot I had a month ago has finally started to kick in. But I haven't had pain there all week now. Praise the Lord!! Now if only the REST of me would get the picture and follow suit. I'm really glad my foot really cleared up, because as of October 1st, my insurance will no longer be paying for podiatry care. Our state's government is bankrupt (or close to it!) and that is how they see fit to fix it...take away even more health care benefits to the poor or the elderly. Makes a lot of sense, doesn't it????!!!
I talked with my dad, who now lives in Michigan in his own apartment, on Monday and he sounded fantastic! He has met a new friend online, her name is Gina and I spoke with her, too, on Monday. She set up a three way phone call. Pretty neat....I would have absolutely NO idea of how to do such things. I'm glad my dad is happy. It's been a long recovery process, and I didn't know how I'd feel seeing him with other women, but I know it's what Mom would have wanted for him. And it isn't really so hard seeing him with someone else (or "hearing" him with someone else, for that matter!). She sounded very nice and sweet and perfect for my zany and crazy dad!! LOL....couldn't help myself there for a moment.
AND, I've saved the best news for last. MY GRANDMA IS COMING TO SEE ME IN DECEMBER!! My grandma (on my mom's side) who moved to Texas shortly before we started our move out there too, decided that two years is too long of a time for us to see each other. I agree! And the last time I saw her, I was in shock and grief over mom's recent death. If it hadn't been for her there with me (as she came from College Station to San Antonio in record time when she heard how bad mom was and that she wouldn't make it for long), I don't think I would have made it. I love my grandma soooo much and have missed her equally so, that I'm thrilled that my in-laws have warmly welcomed her to stay in their home and my aunt and uncle (grandma's son with whom she lives with now) already bought her ticket. When I saw my grandma's name on the ticketless travel receipt in the email, it just tickled me so! OK, so I'm a little giddy....LOL!!! She will be arriving Dec. 8th and staying until after Christmas on Dec. 28th. Three solid, whole weeks!!!
Nothing much else to report. Please pray that I can get to the conference room tonight for that bariatric seminar and please pray I can have the procedure. My husband called up my insurance and verified again they cover this procedure and they said yes, as long as it is for medical purposes and NOT cosmetic. No prob there...all they gotta do is look at my charts and they'll see all my medical problems that could very possibly be corrected by having this procedure. And hopefully this place is the RIGHT place this time!!
I'll be sure to post again tomorrow and let you know how it went. You all have a wonderful day....may it be without too much pain!! We can only hope.
God bless you all,
Until next post,
Missy
IMPORTANT NOTICE:
As many of you know, I have a support group on Facebook that used to be called the same name as my blog. Well, I met a new friend, Sally, and she set up a beautiful forum based on my support group. She worked day and night on it and didn't find the error until the forum was complete. And that was, she left the MY out of the title. But that's not the important news, just a tid-bit. :0) The notice is please accept our sincere apologies about how Facebook kept sending out duplicate messages this past week. We have been in contact with FB, but have not received any response. So I completely understand if you wish to not be part of the FB support group....but please DO come over to our forum. There are NO problems like that over there. We've love to see you all that signed up in the FB group and we would love to meet new people, too. So click on the purple butterflies at the top of this page. See ya there!!
Showing posts with label lap-band procedure. Show all posts
Showing posts with label lap-band procedure. Show all posts
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Saturday, September 18, 2010
Hope On Hold
Howdy, everyone!
Well, I'm doing better than my last post. I am so sorry about that post, I must have seemed like a wild woman or something! My thoughts were all scattered all over the place and I just felt out of control of EVERYTHING. I just couldn't believe what had happened...and just like when I went to the neurosurgeon all excited because he said he could "fix me" and then he rejected me and called me a "poor surgical risk" until I lose weight. I learned one very big lesson through all of this.....DON'T GET YOUR HOPES UP UNTIL IT'S WRITTEN IN STONE!! And that's what I plan to do.
Over the past few days, I've been researching bariatric clinics and that one surgeon my insurance referred me to....that was NOT part of the seminar I went to last month. I should have put two and two together and questioned if I was at the right seminar. Oh, well. Hindsight is ALWAYS 20/20. Anyway, what I found out about the surgeon my insurance will cover is that he is very popular with his patients. He had something like 28 reviews by past and current patients and not a negative word about him anywhere. He comes highly recommended by his patients. And he works out of Banner Gateway hospital instead of that one in Scottsdale where I went to. I truly believe that I was shunted to the wrong surgeon by that seminar. Because they called me bright and early the following morning to set up an appointment. I had even asked her if my insurance covered their program and she lied and said "yes." Then, I wasted two weeks of my time waiting for the disastrous appointment to find out they DON'T take my insurance!
Well, I can't go back in time and fix things. Don't ya wish you could? Yesterday I called the bariatric clinic in Gilbert and unfortunately, I have to take ANOTHER seminar, but luckily this one is this coming Thursday. So I don't have to wait as long. The surgeon I signed up for does the "Realize" band, NOT the Lap-band. They are similar products, just different names, from what I understand. So I can see why I need to go to their seminar as I don't know too much about this "Realize" band. Then after I go to the seminar, I can set up an appointment with the surgeon. Hopefully that appointment will go a lot better!! But I'm not going to get my hopes up yet, or expect anything until AFTER the fact. It just hurts too much when things don't go your way and you were sooooo excited about it, like I was about the Lap-band. I have learned, unfortunately, the hard way about hoping too much.
I am in such flare-up. My right hip hurts so bad every time I put weight on it. I can't remember injuring it in any way. I think it's because the muscles in my back and legs are so tight because of the fibro. I'm on two muscle relaxers that work pretty well....when I'm laying down and using my wedge pillow, I am out like a light within minutes. I've been trying to finish my Janet Evanovich book for a week now, and can't because I keep falling asleep!! And it's an excellent book. If you like mysteries and funny characters, you will LOVE Janet Evanovich. Her books are just a scream with all the hilarious plots and characters. Her main character, Stephanie Plum, is a bounty hunter that isn't every good and her side-kick, Lula, was a former 'ho on the streets. These two gals get themselves into trouble each and every time. Once you read one of her books, you are hooked!! Here is the title of the book I'm reading now. You can buy it right from my favorite store, Amazon! (Yes, I'm part of their affiliate program and for everyone that goes to Amazon through one of MY links, I get paid!)
Alrighty, enough said on that. My hubby is doing fantastic! He is back to his "usual" self. I almost was going to say normal, but WHO really is normal? LOL... He started the Gleevec again last week and is on the full strength dosage now, like what he took before his surgery. Hopefully he won't get that awful leg pain back again as a side-effect from the Gleevec. But if he does, then his pain management doctor is only a phone call away. He still is on the Duragesic patch and that seems to be keeping the pain at bay really well.
His appetite is great, no more nausea or vomiting, and no more diarrhea. I think we have weathered the storm. Whew, what a summer we all had!! I'm soooo glad it's finally over with. Now if only our weather would reflect fall and get out of the triple digits!! I hear by next week, though, we'll be in the 90's. Wooo-hooo!! Major cool wave, huh? LOL!!!!
I hope you all are doing happy and well. God bless you all!
Until next post,
Missy
Well, I'm doing better than my last post. I am so sorry about that post, I must have seemed like a wild woman or something! My thoughts were all scattered all over the place and I just felt out of control of EVERYTHING. I just couldn't believe what had happened...and just like when I went to the neurosurgeon all excited because he said he could "fix me" and then he rejected me and called me a "poor surgical risk" until I lose weight. I learned one very big lesson through all of this.....DON'T GET YOUR HOPES UP UNTIL IT'S WRITTEN IN STONE!! And that's what I plan to do.
Over the past few days, I've been researching bariatric clinics and that one surgeon my insurance referred me to....that was NOT part of the seminar I went to last month. I should have put two and two together and questioned if I was at the right seminar. Oh, well. Hindsight is ALWAYS 20/20. Anyway, what I found out about the surgeon my insurance will cover is that he is very popular with his patients. He had something like 28 reviews by past and current patients and not a negative word about him anywhere. He comes highly recommended by his patients. And he works out of Banner Gateway hospital instead of that one in Scottsdale where I went to. I truly believe that I was shunted to the wrong surgeon by that seminar. Because they called me bright and early the following morning to set up an appointment. I had even asked her if my insurance covered their program and she lied and said "yes." Then, I wasted two weeks of my time waiting for the disastrous appointment to find out they DON'T take my insurance!
Well, I can't go back in time and fix things. Don't ya wish you could? Yesterday I called the bariatric clinic in Gilbert and unfortunately, I have to take ANOTHER seminar, but luckily this one is this coming Thursday. So I don't have to wait as long. The surgeon I signed up for does the "Realize" band, NOT the Lap-band. They are similar products, just different names, from what I understand. So I can see why I need to go to their seminar as I don't know too much about this "Realize" band. Then after I go to the seminar, I can set up an appointment with the surgeon. Hopefully that appointment will go a lot better!! But I'm not going to get my hopes up yet, or expect anything until AFTER the fact. It just hurts too much when things don't go your way and you were sooooo excited about it, like I was about the Lap-band. I have learned, unfortunately, the hard way about hoping too much.
I am in such flare-up. My right hip hurts so bad every time I put weight on it. I can't remember injuring it in any way. I think it's because the muscles in my back and legs are so tight because of the fibro. I'm on two muscle relaxers that work pretty well....when I'm laying down and using my wedge pillow, I am out like a light within minutes. I've been trying to finish my Janet Evanovich book for a week now, and can't because I keep falling asleep!! And it's an excellent book. If you like mysteries and funny characters, you will LOVE Janet Evanovich. Her books are just a scream with all the hilarious plots and characters. Her main character, Stephanie Plum, is a bounty hunter that isn't every good and her side-kick, Lula, was a former 'ho on the streets. These two gals get themselves into trouble each and every time. Once you read one of her books, you are hooked!! Here is the title of the book I'm reading now. You can buy it right from my favorite store, Amazon! (Yes, I'm part of their affiliate program and for everyone that goes to Amazon through one of MY links, I get paid!)
Alrighty, enough said on that. My hubby is doing fantastic! He is back to his "usual" self. I almost was going to say normal, but WHO really is normal? LOL... He started the Gleevec again last week and is on the full strength dosage now, like what he took before his surgery. Hopefully he won't get that awful leg pain back again as a side-effect from the Gleevec. But if he does, then his pain management doctor is only a phone call away. He still is on the Duragesic patch and that seems to be keeping the pain at bay really well.
His appetite is great, no more nausea or vomiting, and no more diarrhea. I think we have weathered the storm. Whew, what a summer we all had!! I'm soooo glad it's finally over with. Now if only our weather would reflect fall and get out of the triple digits!! I hear by next week, though, we'll be in the 90's. Wooo-hooo!! Major cool wave, huh? LOL!!!!
I hope you all are doing happy and well. God bless you all!
Until next post,
Missy
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Hopes Dashed
Howdy, friends!
I am sooooo disappointed! You all know that today was the day I went for the initial appointment for the Lap-band system/program. I was so terribly excited to get started on hopefully, turning my life around and starting anew. The whole family was excited! We (me, my husband and mother-in-law) headed out this morning at 8am as my appointment was at 9am. We had no problems with getting there, as we used our handy-dandy Garmin GPS. I just love Garmin, they are easy to use, the voices easy to understand and it has never steered us wrong. It takes away the "nervous element" of driving because if you don't know where you are going, that IS nerve wracking! My husband will rarely stop at gas stations to ask for directions, so we wander around, yelling at each other, because we can't find where we are going. And those fold-up maps are for the birds! The print is so small, you need a magnifier glass to see it. Anyway, that was my lil' sales pitch of the day. I LOVE Garmin GPS and Amazon....so if you need a GPS, why not check out the link to the left of your screen. Amazon has a wide variety there to pick from.
Okay, on with my story. We get to the place and park. I waddle into the building because my back and right leg are killing me this morning. Morning is NOT my best time. I'm stiff as a board and feel like hell. This morning was no exception, except I was excited to start my new life. We get to the right office and check in and I start filling out the paperwork. Before I could finish, we were called back to the exam room. The financial lady came in first and introduced herself. She had a piece of paper in her hand. She sat down and started to explain the program and what it would cost. Then, she drops the bombshell that they DON'T ACCEPT AHCCCS, MY INSURANCE! I couldn't believe it! My insurance was the one that referred me to them in the first place!! We told the lady that, and she couldn't believe it. There was absolutely NO way that I could afford this program without insurance. The total price was $11,000!!
I just was completely floored. I started to cry, I couldn't hold it back in any longer. Why does this stuff always happen to ME? The lady was very nice, she got me some water and said that she was calling one of the surgeons to come and talk with me. I didn't want that, as I didn't want to hear about a procedure I couldn't have. That was just pure torture. But then she said that she would fax all the information to another office that she thought took AHCCCS. The doctor came in and said that he knew of some surgeons out of a hospital-based clinic that could help me. So he took my information (name, phone, address) and said that they would call me to set up an appointment. We then left the office, our heads hung, our hearts broken. What a let down! Now I have to go through another waiting period! It just sucks!
So that was how my appointment went. I wanted so badly to report a different story...like when my surgery was going to be. Now I've got to go through everything again and wait for an appointment, wait for them to call me. I'm so depressed! Why does this crap always happen to me???
Okay, on to more cheerful stuff. The new Fibro Forum is going extremely well. Last time I checked the membership list, we were at 119 members and counting. I hope that everyone that belonged to my fibro group on Facebook will join the forum, too. It's really cool and fun. I've met a lot of neat folks over there. And all the forums cover such a wide variety of topics, it will make your head swim! So please join....it's free and easy to do. But if you have any questions, please don't hesitate to ask.
That pretty much is it for this post. I think it's enough! Oh....I've also got some new blog award winners to announce and on the brand new page set up JUST for the winners!! So head on over to the winner's page and check out some excellent blogs. :0)
I hope you all have a blessed day!
Until next post,
Missy
I am sooooo disappointed! You all know that today was the day I went for the initial appointment for the Lap-band system/program. I was so terribly excited to get started on hopefully, turning my life around and starting anew. The whole family was excited! We (me, my husband and mother-in-law) headed out this morning at 8am as my appointment was at 9am. We had no problems with getting there, as we used our handy-dandy Garmin GPS. I just love Garmin, they are easy to use, the voices easy to understand and it has never steered us wrong. It takes away the "nervous element" of driving because if you don't know where you are going, that IS nerve wracking! My husband will rarely stop at gas stations to ask for directions, so we wander around, yelling at each other, because we can't find where we are going. And those fold-up maps are for the birds! The print is so small, you need a magnifier glass to see it. Anyway, that was my lil' sales pitch of the day. I LOVE Garmin GPS and Amazon....so if you need a GPS, why not check out the link to the left of your screen. Amazon has a wide variety there to pick from.
Okay, on with my story. We get to the place and park. I waddle into the building because my back and right leg are killing me this morning. Morning is NOT my best time. I'm stiff as a board and feel like hell. This morning was no exception, except I was excited to start my new life. We get to the right office and check in and I start filling out the paperwork. Before I could finish, we were called back to the exam room. The financial lady came in first and introduced herself. She had a piece of paper in her hand. She sat down and started to explain the program and what it would cost. Then, she drops the bombshell that they DON'T ACCEPT AHCCCS, MY INSURANCE! I couldn't believe it! My insurance was the one that referred me to them in the first place!! We told the lady that, and she couldn't believe it. There was absolutely NO way that I could afford this program without insurance. The total price was $11,000!!
I just was completely floored. I started to cry, I couldn't hold it back in any longer. Why does this stuff always happen to ME? The lady was very nice, she got me some water and said that she was calling one of the surgeons to come and talk with me. I didn't want that, as I didn't want to hear about a procedure I couldn't have. That was just pure torture. But then she said that she would fax all the information to another office that she thought took AHCCCS. The doctor came in and said that he knew of some surgeons out of a hospital-based clinic that could help me. So he took my information (name, phone, address) and said that they would call me to set up an appointment. We then left the office, our heads hung, our hearts broken. What a let down! Now I have to go through another waiting period! It just sucks!
So that was how my appointment went. I wanted so badly to report a different story...like when my surgery was going to be. Now I've got to go through everything again and wait for an appointment, wait for them to call me. I'm so depressed! Why does this crap always happen to me???
Okay, on to more cheerful stuff. The new Fibro Forum is going extremely well. Last time I checked the membership list, we were at 119 members and counting. I hope that everyone that belonged to my fibro group on Facebook will join the forum, too. It's really cool and fun. I've met a lot of neat folks over there. And all the forums cover such a wide variety of topics, it will make your head swim! So please join....it's free and easy to do. But if you have any questions, please don't hesitate to ask.
That pretty much is it for this post. I think it's enough! Oh....I've also got some new blog award winners to announce and on the brand new page set up JUST for the winners!! So head on over to the winner's page and check out some excellent blogs. :0)
I hope you all have a blessed day!
Until next post,
Missy
Friday, September 10, 2010
Back To...Normal?
Woo-hoo! Yippee!! Can I officially say that we are back to "normal?" What the heck IS normal, anyway? Frankie is doing fabulous. Even his pain levels have decreased some - he remains on the Duragesic patch, however, and Percocet for breakthrough pain. He resumed the Gleevec (for the GIST cancer that he has) two days ago after a 2 month hold due to the surgery and all the complications that ensued. Now that he is back on the Gleevec, the leg pain will resume full force. I hope not - I truly do. But that side-effect is one he has always had with Gleevec. But I'd rather him be alive than to stop the Gleevec all together and have the cancer return. He feels the same way, although it was nice to have that little pill "vacation" for awhile!!! It's like returning to work after a vacation. You don't really want to be there, but you have to because if you don't, how will the bills get paid?
I took a two photos of Frankie just about 10 minutes ago to show you how he's coming along. The first one is of him sitting in his favorite spot on the couch, eating a bowl of cereal. The second one is of his drain-free belly! All that's left is the incision (which is all healed up) and a band-aid over the drain site. I'm keeping it there because he's a "picker" and always picks or peels scabs off before they are ready to come off. He even has scars from old scabs he's picked years ago. I told him if he even remotely touches the scab over that hole, that I will personally cut every one of his fingers off! I'm mean, aren't I? It's just that hole goes down into ultimately his intestines. I don't want any repeat of infection or ANYTHING to land us back at square one again!! Here's the pics for your viewing pleasure:
NO DRAIN!! Do ya like the neon green band-aid? :0)
Doesn't he look good, though? He's pale, still, but his red blood cell count went from 8.2 to 10. My mother-in-law's cooking is great AND very healing, since he is on NO iron supplements. The only thing I have him on are Vitamin B Complex, Multivitamin, and his regular medications. He can't really go out in the sun too much because of the medications he takes don't mesh well with sunlight. If he sweats too much, his pain patches fall off or even worse, his body absorbs all the medication from it and he gets a little "loopy." Luckily, that has happened only once. He sounded absolutely drunk that day and slept all day and all night! So we try to keep him nice and cool. Which sometimes is very hard in steamy Arizona!!
Jackie feels left out, so I took a picture of him, too. He is in his "house" which REALLY is his carrier. (Shhhh...don't tell him that!)) He loves his "house" and is in it quite frequently. That or his little cat bed that I have right next to his "house." He only wishes he could put the bed INSIDE the house....then he'd have it made! But his bed is too big. :-(
Isn't he just adorable? He knows it, too. Silly kitty!!! He has both me AND my husband wrapped around his fuzzy tail!! I just love his new "house", too. It's rugged and has rods inside that keep the ceiling up and the sides. His last carrier was awful....it was too soft and kept collapsing on him. I've picked out from Amazon what looks closest to what Jack has now and the same price I paid for it, too. I highly recommend it to any pet-owner!
Well, that pretty much is it. I'm in a flare-up mode (when am I NOT is a better question!) and just so exhausted. Like I can't ever make up sleep. My limbs feel like heavy sand bags and when I get to my feet, all my weight just drops and my knees sometimes will buckle underneath me. I cannot WAIT to start this Lap-band "journey" as they call it in their brochure. Next Wednesday is the initial appointment where they tell me what insurance will pay and what we will pay. I hope it's not too much....so please pray for me that it won't be bigger than the national debt! LOL!
Tim, the visiting nurse is coming over one last time to discharge Frankie off home health services. I will miss him! He's funny, nice and easy to talk to. Very helpful, too. And then I have a doctor's appt. at 12:30. Much to do yet I sit here playing on the computer.....
Be sure to check out my blog award page. I've entered more blog sites you MUST see...they are fantastic! If you have a blog, leave the URL in my comments section and I will come visit your blog. I love blog-hopping!
And PLEASE, please vote in my poll up above, to the left in the side bar. You can't miss it...it's the first item there. I would greatly appreciate it!
You all have a fabulous Friday and a great weekend. I hope you don't have flare-ups or pain of any kind, my friends.
God bless,
Until next post,
Missy
I took a two photos of Frankie just about 10 minutes ago to show you how he's coming along. The first one is of him sitting in his favorite spot on the couch, eating a bowl of cereal. The second one is of his drain-free belly! All that's left is the incision (which is all healed up) and a band-aid over the drain site. I'm keeping it there because he's a "picker" and always picks or peels scabs off before they are ready to come off. He even has scars from old scabs he's picked years ago. I told him if he even remotely touches the scab over that hole, that I will personally cut every one of his fingers off! I'm mean, aren't I? It's just that hole goes down into ultimately his intestines. I don't want any repeat of infection or ANYTHING to land us back at square one again!! Here's the pics for your viewing pleasure:
Doesn't he look good, though? He's pale, still, but his red blood cell count went from 8.2 to 10. My mother-in-law's cooking is great AND very healing, since he is on NO iron supplements. The only thing I have him on are Vitamin B Complex, Multivitamin, and his regular medications. He can't really go out in the sun too much because of the medications he takes don't mesh well with sunlight. If he sweats too much, his pain patches fall off or even worse, his body absorbs all the medication from it and he gets a little "loopy." Luckily, that has happened only once. He sounded absolutely drunk that day and slept all day and all night! So we try to keep him nice and cool. Which sometimes is very hard in steamy Arizona!!
Jackie feels left out, so I took a picture of him, too. He is in his "house" which REALLY is his carrier. (Shhhh...don't tell him that!)) He loves his "house" and is in it quite frequently. That or his little cat bed that I have right next to his "house." He only wishes he could put the bed INSIDE the house....then he'd have it made! But his bed is too big. :-(
Well, that pretty much is it. I'm in a flare-up mode (when am I NOT is a better question!) and just so exhausted. Like I can't ever make up sleep. My limbs feel like heavy sand bags and when I get to my feet, all my weight just drops and my knees sometimes will buckle underneath me. I cannot WAIT to start this Lap-band "journey" as they call it in their brochure. Next Wednesday is the initial appointment where they tell me what insurance will pay and what we will pay. I hope it's not too much....so please pray for me that it won't be bigger than the national debt! LOL!
Tim, the visiting nurse is coming over one last time to discharge Frankie off home health services. I will miss him! He's funny, nice and easy to talk to. Very helpful, too. And then I have a doctor's appt. at 12:30. Much to do yet I sit here playing on the computer.....
Be sure to check out my blog award page. I've entered more blog sites you MUST see...they are fantastic! If you have a blog, leave the URL in my comments section and I will come visit your blog. I love blog-hopping!
And PLEASE, please vote in my poll up above, to the left in the side bar. You can't miss it...it's the first item there. I would greatly appreciate it!
You all have a fabulous Friday and a great weekend. I hope you don't have flare-ups or pain of any kind, my friends.
God bless,
Until next post,
Missy
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Happy September!!
Good day, my fine friends!
Happy September 1st! I thought I'd start the day/month out with a blog post. Can you believe it's already September 1st? Where has the time gone? I'll bet the kiddos are happy to be back in school....NOT. I remember when I was a kid (a long time ago!) I didn't like summer to be over and then having to trot back to school for another year of carrying heavy books and listening to your teachers drone on and on about things that happened way before you were even born! As you can see, I'm NOT a historical buff!
I don't feel too badly today, of course I had my morning cocktail of pills, pills and more pills. I wonder if I will ever have a day again where I don't have to take pills all day? Maybe after the lap-band surgery I can drop some of my pain meds, blood pressure meds, and the diabetes pill. We shall see. I'm so excited because this is the month I go for the initial appointment for the lap-band and since I've already had the cardiology clearance, it should save a lot of time and we can move forward.
Well, today is the day I go back to the foot doctor. I plan on holding up my grossly swollen feet and saying, "fix me!" If anything, my foot is even worse than when I went in the first place. The shot he gave me did nothing. He also said something about getting insurance authorization to take care of my ingrown toenail. Sounds fun! He better hurry. I got a letter from my insurance stating that due to the state's bad budget, more people are going onto the state insurance so they are cutting back on things for people over 21 yrs. old. One of them is podiatry care! Great! I've only got one month until this takes effect, so hopefully everything will be done in that time. They ALWAYS take away from people over 21 yrs old, while if I were a kid, I could get everything - dental care, even. As it stands, I can't take care of my teeth issues because I have no insurance and my other health issues kind of trump the dentist. All in due time, as my dad always said.
I'm sure you've noticed all my Amazon ads on my blog. I signed up with their Amazon Associates program and they approved my blog almost immediately! Makes me feel better, since Google adsense rejected it (after looking at the WRONG blog) and then went on to say I have broken links, under construction signs, ect. I appealed my application and still haven't heard anything back. They are soooo way over the estimated "week" they told me a month ago! Anyway, I just LOVE Amazon and have been ordering from them for years. You can get all kinds of stuff there and I've included a "search" Amazon widget near the bottom of the page for your shopping convenience. Everything you order off of my blog, I get commission for. So if you love Amazon, too and order a lot, please do so off of my blog, please. :0)
You remember me talking about that pillow wedge that I use? Well, on Amazon it is even cheaper than what I got at ActiveForever.com! And it works so well and takes pressure off my lumbar spine. If I didn't have that pillow, I'd have to sleep sitting up because I can't lay on either side. Here is the pillow wedge link in the sidebar if you are interested:
I find it helps very much if your ankles swell, too. It keeps them raised while you sleep. While my ankles are always swollen, they are a lot less so in the morning when I get up from having them raised all night. I also keep them raised while reading, too. It's soooooo very comfy, if I don't say so myself!! :0)
Another product that I highly recommend if you have a sore neck is "the neck pillow." So much more than a regular pillow, it centers your head and neck in a cradle of comfort! I love mine! Here is the link for that in the sidebar:
One product that I use on a daily basis is a pillbox organizer. I take so many things, I'd be lost without it!! Here is just one of many types/designs. This is the one that I use:
Hmmm.....I see they have a 31 day organizer out now that I may have to buy myself!
One more product that I just can't live WITHOUT is my TENS machine. And Amazon has a number of them, both new and used, that will do the trick. They even have the electrodes and conductive gel, if you need that. Here is the link to a similar machine to what I have and love:
I hope you all have a great day and the start of another week. Joy, health and peace I wish for all!!!
God bless,
Until next post,
Missy
Happy September 1st! I thought I'd start the day/month out with a blog post. Can you believe it's already September 1st? Where has the time gone? I'll bet the kiddos are happy to be back in school....NOT. I remember when I was a kid (a long time ago!) I didn't like summer to be over and then having to trot back to school for another year of carrying heavy books and listening to your teachers drone on and on about things that happened way before you were even born! As you can see, I'm NOT a historical buff!
I don't feel too badly today, of course I had my morning cocktail of pills, pills and more pills. I wonder if I will ever have a day again where I don't have to take pills all day? Maybe after the lap-band surgery I can drop some of my pain meds, blood pressure meds, and the diabetes pill. We shall see. I'm so excited because this is the month I go for the initial appointment for the lap-band and since I've already had the cardiology clearance, it should save a lot of time and we can move forward.
Well, today is the day I go back to the foot doctor. I plan on holding up my grossly swollen feet and saying, "fix me!" If anything, my foot is even worse than when I went in the first place. The shot he gave me did nothing. He also said something about getting insurance authorization to take care of my ingrown toenail. Sounds fun! He better hurry. I got a letter from my insurance stating that due to the state's bad budget, more people are going onto the state insurance so they are cutting back on things for people over 21 yrs. old. One of them is podiatry care! Great! I've only got one month until this takes effect, so hopefully everything will be done in that time. They ALWAYS take away from people over 21 yrs old, while if I were a kid, I could get everything - dental care, even. As it stands, I can't take care of my teeth issues because I have no insurance and my other health issues kind of trump the dentist. All in due time, as my dad always said.
I'm sure you've noticed all my Amazon ads on my blog. I signed up with their Amazon Associates program and they approved my blog almost immediately! Makes me feel better, since Google adsense rejected it (after looking at the WRONG blog) and then went on to say I have broken links, under construction signs, ect. I appealed my application and still haven't heard anything back. They are soooo way over the estimated "week" they told me a month ago! Anyway, I just LOVE Amazon and have been ordering from them for years. You can get all kinds of stuff there and I've included a "search" Amazon widget near the bottom of the page for your shopping convenience. Everything you order off of my blog, I get commission for. So if you love Amazon, too and order a lot, please do so off of my blog, please. :0)
You remember me talking about that pillow wedge that I use? Well, on Amazon it is even cheaper than what I got at ActiveForever.com! And it works so well and takes pressure off my lumbar spine. If I didn't have that pillow, I'd have to sleep sitting up because I can't lay on either side. Here is the pillow wedge link in the sidebar if you are interested:
I find it helps very much if your ankles swell, too. It keeps them raised while you sleep. While my ankles are always swollen, they are a lot less so in the morning when I get up from having them raised all night. I also keep them raised while reading, too. It's soooooo very comfy, if I don't say so myself!! :0)
Another product that I highly recommend if you have a sore neck is "the neck pillow." So much more than a regular pillow, it centers your head and neck in a cradle of comfort! I love mine! Here is the link for that in the sidebar:
One product that I use on a daily basis is a pillbox organizer. I take so many things, I'd be lost without it!! Here is just one of many types/designs. This is the one that I use:
Hmmm.....I see they have a 31 day organizer out now that I may have to buy myself!
One more product that I just can't live WITHOUT is my TENS machine. And Amazon has a number of them, both new and used, that will do the trick. They even have the electrodes and conductive gel, if you need that. Here is the link to a similar machine to what I have and love:
I hope you all have a great day and the start of another week. Joy, health and peace I wish for all!!!
God bless,
Until next post,
Missy
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Early Morning Rising
Good morning, everyone!
I remember when I would be working nights, I would always take about ten-fifteen minutes right around sunrise time. The Arizona sky would light up into a brilliant spectrum of colors....red, orange and blue. Of course, after my little break, I'd have to go back to work and it would start the busy time: patients getting up, moving around, washing up, getting ready for breakfast. We would be running around like chickens with our heads cut off until report time. But I still remember that one brief period of quiet time and watching the sunrise and thinking back over my life (to see if I forgot anything!) and thinking ahead to see where I'm going. It's a great time to reflect on life.
I'm no longer working, but I still love the sunrise. I get up at 5am and everyone is still asleep, so it's so nice and quiet and peaceful. This is when I do my emails and blogging most of the time because it's easier to think and not be interrupted. Unfortunately, this early time is when I miss my mom the most. I remember her picking me up from work and we'd get breakfast and watch "Charmed" reruns while we ate. The guys would be alseep, still and we could talk about anything. Now I'm missing my early morning buddy more than anything in the world!! You'd think after 2 years, I wouldn't be so nostalgic all the time, but if anything, I think as time passes I'm even MORE nostalgic about my mom. Does it ever end? I know I'll never forget her (I think of her everyday), but will it get easier and not hurt as much when I think of her? I can only wonder.
Nothing much else to report. Frankie is doing well, drain and all. When I empty his abdominal drain, I get anywhere from 5cc-20cc's out. Hopefully he can have that removed when he sees the surgeon Sept. 7th. Every time when the visiting nurse comes out, he says the drain site is looking really good and Frankie's vitals are in normal range. I check them periodically, too, and they have been normal for me, too. I'm just glad that the hospital ordeal seems to be over with! Knock on wood....such as my hard head! LOL!
I'm still in the fibro flare-up I had all last week, although I think it has lifted somewhat. I am still so very stiff (especially upon waking) and my left foot is still very sore. I go back to the podiatrist on Tuesday so I'll mention that the shot he gave me didn't help at all. Speaking of fibro, I want to mention a very good book called "Fibromyalgia For Dummies." It is very informative and educational. Check it out on Amazon.com. I've made it very easy - just click on the link to the left and it'll take you right there. You can buy it either new or used. I've bought a lot of stuff from Amazon and think they are the BEST on the 'net. I've also got a "ferris wheel" of fibro books from Amazon at the top of my blog that you can take a look at. Or, you can do your own search using the widget below to look for Amazon merchandise. Am I just a shop-a-holic's dream? LOL....
I don't know if I've blogged this yet, and if I have, bear with me. I will be seeing the bariatric surgeon on Sept. 15th and have a conference with him (or her), the nutritionist, the physical therapist and case manager. It's a whole team and program that I will be involved in. They ran my insurance and I DO have benefits and they will go over that on the 15th. My mother-in-law will come with. BOTH my in-laws are so sweet as they will be helping me with what my insurance WON'T cover, so I can go through with the surgery and program. I am soooo very happy and grateful and ecstatic! (Am I something else or what...being excited over SURGERY! LOL!) Of course, I will owe them until kingdom come, but if it gets my life back or an even better one where I can move around a lot easier because I won't have all this weight holding me down, it'll be more than worth it. So I will be undergoing this program and I will keep everyone updated on my progress with pictures. This way, I'll have to stay on the program as I won't want to look like a fool in front of everybody!
Alrighty, that pretty much is it. To end this post, I'll include a video I took in San Diego of my mom and grandma walking through the surf on Mission Beach. I'm so glad I have these videos, even though they have no sound, I can see her moving again. I cherish each video and picture I have. I hope that you cherish your family's members and heritage. You only have ONE shot in this life to make a difference, so make it a good one!! That's my "pearl" of wisdom for the day. Whew...it tuckered me out, might have to take a nap.....
God bless ya!
Until next post,
Missy
I remember when I would be working nights, I would always take about ten-fifteen minutes right around sunrise time. The Arizona sky would light up into a brilliant spectrum of colors....red, orange and blue. Of course, after my little break, I'd have to go back to work and it would start the busy time: patients getting up, moving around, washing up, getting ready for breakfast. We would be running around like chickens with our heads cut off until report time. But I still remember that one brief period of quiet time and watching the sunrise and thinking back over my life (to see if I forgot anything!) and thinking ahead to see where I'm going. It's a great time to reflect on life.
I'm no longer working, but I still love the sunrise. I get up at 5am and everyone is still asleep, so it's so nice and quiet and peaceful. This is when I do my emails and blogging most of the time because it's easier to think and not be interrupted. Unfortunately, this early time is when I miss my mom the most. I remember her picking me up from work and we'd get breakfast and watch "Charmed" reruns while we ate. The guys would be alseep, still and we could talk about anything. Now I'm missing my early morning buddy more than anything in the world!! You'd think after 2 years, I wouldn't be so nostalgic all the time, but if anything, I think as time passes I'm even MORE nostalgic about my mom. Does it ever end? I know I'll never forget her (I think of her everyday), but will it get easier and not hurt as much when I think of her? I can only wonder.
Nothing much else to report. Frankie is doing well, drain and all. When I empty his abdominal drain, I get anywhere from 5cc-20cc's out. Hopefully he can have that removed when he sees the surgeon Sept. 7th. Every time when the visiting nurse comes out, he says the drain site is looking really good and Frankie's vitals are in normal range. I check them periodically, too, and they have been normal for me, too. I'm just glad that the hospital ordeal seems to be over with! Knock on wood....such as my hard head! LOL!
I'm still in the fibro flare-up I had all last week, although I think it has lifted somewhat. I am still so very stiff (especially upon waking) and my left foot is still very sore. I go back to the podiatrist on Tuesday so I'll mention that the shot he gave me didn't help at all. Speaking of fibro, I want to mention a very good book called "Fibromyalgia For Dummies." It is very informative and educational. Check it out on Amazon.com. I've made it very easy - just click on the link to the left and it'll take you right there. You can buy it either new or used. I've bought a lot of stuff from Amazon and think they are the BEST on the 'net. I've also got a "ferris wheel" of fibro books from Amazon at the top of my blog that you can take a look at. Or, you can do your own search using the widget below to look for Amazon merchandise. Am I just a shop-a-holic's dream? LOL....
I don't know if I've blogged this yet, and if I have, bear with me. I will be seeing the bariatric surgeon on Sept. 15th and have a conference with him (or her), the nutritionist, the physical therapist and case manager. It's a whole team and program that I will be involved in. They ran my insurance and I DO have benefits and they will go over that on the 15th. My mother-in-law will come with. BOTH my in-laws are so sweet as they will be helping me with what my insurance WON'T cover, so I can go through with the surgery and program. I am soooo very happy and grateful and ecstatic! (Am I something else or what...being excited over SURGERY! LOL!) Of course, I will owe them until kingdom come, but if it gets my life back or an even better one where I can move around a lot easier because I won't have all this weight holding me down, it'll be more than worth it. So I will be undergoing this program and I will keep everyone updated on my progress with pictures. This way, I'll have to stay on the program as I won't want to look like a fool in front of everybody!
Alrighty, that pretty much is it. To end this post, I'll include a video I took in San Diego of my mom and grandma walking through the surf on Mission Beach. I'm so glad I have these videos, even though they have no sound, I can see her moving again. I cherish each video and picture I have. I hope that you cherish your family's members and heritage. You only have ONE shot in this life to make a difference, so make it a good one!! That's my "pearl" of wisdom for the day. Whew...it tuckered me out, might have to take a nap.....
God bless ya!
Until next post,
Missy
Thursday, August 26, 2010
The Way Things Should Have Been
Hello, everyone!
I've been in a real self reflective mood recently. Thinking about where I came from, where I've been and where I'm supposed to go and then panic strikes as I am afraid I may never get there! It sometimes wakes me up at night and my heart is racing and I'm just feeling really anxious. Nothing went the way it was planned. Nothing.
It all started when I got fibromyalgia. I believe it was way back in the first year of nursing school. I remember walking long walks with my dad and then wham! One day came my second year of school and I couldn't walk a block without my calves being bone hard and hurting like all get-out. I was thin in nursing school. Here's what I looked like:
This was taken my first year of nursing school in 1991. I was modeling off my new clinical uniform that grandma and grandpa bought for me. I remember them getting me a lot of my nursing school stuff: uniforms, stethoscope and books. My mom tried real hard and worked real hard, but those were extra expenses she couldn't swing. The state of Michigan paid for my education....and I never even worked a day as a nurse there! I had a pell grant that took me all through school.
Anyway, back on point. I looked and felt great and then the fibro comes and I couldn't walk with my dad anymore so the weight started to creep up on me. School was very stressful and I had that speech impediment and I found great comfort in Sara Lee and Betty Crocker. Fine ladies in my humble opinion!! When I graduated from nursing school, I looked like this:
As you can see, my youthful figure got lost somewhere inside this person's body!!! Once my weight started to creep up, it did it with a vengeance. I couldn't stop eating for comfort. It's no secret that I had a lot of stressors back then....my dad and his prescription drug habit, my mom and her failing health and working 12 hour shifts EVERYDAY for three months, and we couldn't keep a car running for more than a few days. I had to get to my clinicals and it's kind of hard without wheels. So my mom was real inventive and I went to school in ambulances far more than I'm willing to count. (She was a 911 operator for Medic One) The paramedics loved it and would zoom me to school with lights and sirens blaring. I'd slink out and walk as fast as I could inside the building. Oh, well, desperate times call for desperate measures. I graduated with honors May of 1993.
I came to good ole' Arizona in 1993 and landed a job at Yuma Regional Medical Center, where I worked for the next 10 years. I worked on a med-surg floor and we got patients ranging from cancer to kidney dialysis. I learned a lot. Then I moved on to Yuma Rehab Hospital for another 3 years and it was here that my fibro was really getting out of hand. I had to call in sick a lot and they didn't like that. I could barely walk, how could I work? I used up all my sick time and we started having problems with finances. (To back up - I got married in Nov. of 1996 and we moved in with my parents in Yuma to combine expenses as they weren't doing so hot with paying bills, either!)
I clashed big time with the manager at the rehab, quit that job and got another with a hole-in-the-wall nursing home in town. That was my worst job to date. I was in charge of everything- 100 residents and only two nurse's aides to help. The emotional eating got really bad at that job and I ballooned up even more. Since I'm being so honest, I'll show you a picture of how I look now, even though the pic was taken a few years ago in Imperial Beach, CA.
I really did NOT want this picture taken, but my mom was very stern about it. I couldn't take any more of her if she couldn't take any of me. So I allowed a one time viewing of Shamu-the whale....(that would be me!) Anyway, I worked at the nursing home for six months, then couldn't stand it anymore and quit that job. I then tried travel nursing and that's how we got to San Antonio, where we had planned to move to as I had lined up a wonderful job at Northeast Methodist in Rolling Oaks, TX. But, because of my weight and how I felt, I knew in my heart I couldn't keep that job long. I could barely stand, let alone work a 12 hour shift. The weight on my bones and joints is excruciating. I am soooo very angry at myself for gaining so much weight!!! How could I be such a pig? I just don't deserve to live! God, I hope my insurance approves that lap-band procedure!!
I've spoken in previous posts about what happened in San Antonio and my mother's death. I decided at that point that I was going to lose weight and I just didn't eat. I didn't FEEL like eating. My whole world was turned upside down, inside out. I lost 100 pounds since her death July 2008. But I still have about 150 MORE pounds to go and I'm just stuck. At each doctor's appointment, my weight is either the same or higher. And I don't cheat or eat half as much as I used to. It's just not fair! And now I can't even stand for five minutes without my legs feeling like they were thrown in a vat with steel knives and burning hot oil. It's horrible!!
It shouldn't have worked out like this. I should still be working, our bills paid, my mom still alive and with my dad, and Frankie and me living in our own apartment but still close to our family. We should be planning for vacations and getting flat screen TV's and a computer in every room. I love STUFF and we should be getting STUFF. Unfortunately, it just isn't how it should be and for that, I'm very depressed.
Have you ever felt like that? I can't even talk to my dad about it. It's funny. When he left for Michigan in May of 2009, he promised he'd call me every day and email, too. Now, I'm lucky if I get a one-liner email every two months. Phone calls are practically non-existent. Guess he's moving on quite nicely in his own apartment and going on chat lines. Maybe it's for the best. I can't deal with his drug problems right now in my life. I feel storm battered and I need to heal and recover from the past.
At least I have my husband's parents to lean on, and my wonderful sister-in-law and brother-in-law. My grandma lives in Texas with her son and I have her calling me very frequently, which I absolutely LOVE. I love hearing her voice and distinctive laugh. It instantly cheers me up. I miss her so much it hurts. When we can finally get our stuff back from San Antonio storage, we are definitely meeting up for lunch. She said she would come from College Station just to see me! That warms my heart. My husband and I have had a very rough road, but at least we haven't had to travel it alone. So even though things didn't go quite as I had long ago planned, maybe my life was meant to go a different way and I'm learning as I go down life's bumpy road.
Whew! My fingers are getting very sore so I must stop for tonight. Thanks for listening to me drone on and on. I love blogging and all my new online friends. You guys and gals are family to me, too, and I cherish each and every one of you!!
God bless!!
Be Well!!
Until next post,
Missy
I've been in a real self reflective mood recently. Thinking about where I came from, where I've been and where I'm supposed to go and then panic strikes as I am afraid I may never get there! It sometimes wakes me up at night and my heart is racing and I'm just feeling really anxious. Nothing went the way it was planned. Nothing.
It all started when I got fibromyalgia. I believe it was way back in the first year of nursing school. I remember walking long walks with my dad and then wham! One day came my second year of school and I couldn't walk a block without my calves being bone hard and hurting like all get-out. I was thin in nursing school. Here's what I looked like:
This was taken my first year of nursing school in 1991. I was modeling off my new clinical uniform that grandma and grandpa bought for me. I remember them getting me a lot of my nursing school stuff: uniforms, stethoscope and books. My mom tried real hard and worked real hard, but those were extra expenses she couldn't swing. The state of Michigan paid for my education....and I never even worked a day as a nurse there! I had a pell grant that took me all through school.
Anyway, back on point. I looked and felt great and then the fibro comes and I couldn't walk with my dad anymore so the weight started to creep up on me. School was very stressful and I had that speech impediment and I found great comfort in Sara Lee and Betty Crocker. Fine ladies in my humble opinion!! When I graduated from nursing school, I looked like this:
As you can see, my youthful figure got lost somewhere inside this person's body!!! Once my weight started to creep up, it did it with a vengeance. I couldn't stop eating for comfort. It's no secret that I had a lot of stressors back then....my dad and his prescription drug habit, my mom and her failing health and working 12 hour shifts EVERYDAY for three months, and we couldn't keep a car running for more than a few days. I had to get to my clinicals and it's kind of hard without wheels. So my mom was real inventive and I went to school in ambulances far more than I'm willing to count. (She was a 911 operator for Medic One) The paramedics loved it and would zoom me to school with lights and sirens blaring. I'd slink out and walk as fast as I could inside the building. Oh, well, desperate times call for desperate measures. I graduated with honors May of 1993.
I came to good ole' Arizona in 1993 and landed a job at Yuma Regional Medical Center, where I worked for the next 10 years. I worked on a med-surg floor and we got patients ranging from cancer to kidney dialysis. I learned a lot. Then I moved on to Yuma Rehab Hospital for another 3 years and it was here that my fibro was really getting out of hand. I had to call in sick a lot and they didn't like that. I could barely walk, how could I work? I used up all my sick time and we started having problems with finances. (To back up - I got married in Nov. of 1996 and we moved in with my parents in Yuma to combine expenses as they weren't doing so hot with paying bills, either!)
I clashed big time with the manager at the rehab, quit that job and got another with a hole-in-the-wall nursing home in town. That was my worst job to date. I was in charge of everything- 100 residents and only two nurse's aides to help. The emotional eating got really bad at that job and I ballooned up even more. Since I'm being so honest, I'll show you a picture of how I look now, even though the pic was taken a few years ago in Imperial Beach, CA.
I really did NOT want this picture taken, but my mom was very stern about it. I couldn't take any more of her if she couldn't take any of me. So I allowed a one time viewing of Shamu-the whale....(that would be me!) Anyway, I worked at the nursing home for six months, then couldn't stand it anymore and quit that job. I then tried travel nursing and that's how we got to San Antonio, where we had planned to move to as I had lined up a wonderful job at Northeast Methodist in Rolling Oaks, TX. But, because of my weight and how I felt, I knew in my heart I couldn't keep that job long. I could barely stand, let alone work a 12 hour shift. The weight on my bones and joints is excruciating. I am soooo very angry at myself for gaining so much weight!!! How could I be such a pig? I just don't deserve to live! God, I hope my insurance approves that lap-band procedure!!
I've spoken in previous posts about what happened in San Antonio and my mother's death. I decided at that point that I was going to lose weight and I just didn't eat. I didn't FEEL like eating. My whole world was turned upside down, inside out. I lost 100 pounds since her death July 2008. But I still have about 150 MORE pounds to go and I'm just stuck. At each doctor's appointment, my weight is either the same or higher. And I don't cheat or eat half as much as I used to. It's just not fair! And now I can't even stand for five minutes without my legs feeling like they were thrown in a vat with steel knives and burning hot oil. It's horrible!!
It shouldn't have worked out like this. I should still be working, our bills paid, my mom still alive and with my dad, and Frankie and me living in our own apartment but still close to our family. We should be planning for vacations and getting flat screen TV's and a computer in every room. I love STUFF and we should be getting STUFF. Unfortunately, it just isn't how it should be and for that, I'm very depressed.
Have you ever felt like that? I can't even talk to my dad about it. It's funny. When he left for Michigan in May of 2009, he promised he'd call me every day and email, too. Now, I'm lucky if I get a one-liner email every two months. Phone calls are practically non-existent. Guess he's moving on quite nicely in his own apartment and going on chat lines. Maybe it's for the best. I can't deal with his drug problems right now in my life. I feel storm battered and I need to heal and recover from the past.
At least I have my husband's parents to lean on, and my wonderful sister-in-law and brother-in-law. My grandma lives in Texas with her son and I have her calling me very frequently, which I absolutely LOVE. I love hearing her voice and distinctive laugh. It instantly cheers me up. I miss her so much it hurts. When we can finally get our stuff back from San Antonio storage, we are definitely meeting up for lunch. She said she would come from College Station just to see me! That warms my heart. My husband and I have had a very rough road, but at least we haven't had to travel it alone. So even though things didn't go quite as I had long ago planned, maybe my life was meant to go a different way and I'm learning as I go down life's bumpy road.
Whew! My fingers are getting very sore so I must stop for tonight. Thanks for listening to me drone on and on. I love blogging and all my new online friends. You guys and gals are family to me, too, and I cherish each and every one of you!!
God bless!!
Be Well!!
Until next post,
Missy
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Lap-Band Seminar
Howdy, fine folks!
Hope everything is A-OK in your world on this "hump" day of the week! When I was in school, I liked Wednesdays as it meant we were half the way there to Friday. I liked Fridays EVEN MORE, as that meant the weekend and sleeping in. Ahhh, thinking back to my youth always makes me think hard at how so many things I considered "problems" then are just a little bump on the road of life. I didn't have the fibro then, or the arthritis. I was healthy - a little on the plump side - I've battled the bulge for many, many years now. I only took an aspirin if I had a headache, which was not very often. Problems then consisted of a run in your nylon or no chap stick or lipstick on your teeth that you didn't discover until the END of the day! The problems of now are so much more serious (our crumbling economy, unemployment is up, famine, earthquakes, you get the picture!) and I am no longer the picture of health. In fact, my medication list is as long as my arm! When I fill out new patient forms and they ask what meds I'm taking I always say "see med list" as I carry a med list with me all the time. It makes life so much easier!! I highly recommend that everyone make out a medication list and stick it in your pocket or purse. You won't believe how handy it is to have!
OK, I'll get off my soap box now. Last night my hubby and I went to Banner Estrella for the lap-band seminar. My hubby has been enjoying getting out into the open air and has been coming along with me on many of our errands. I think it helps to build up his strength more. He can hide the drain under his shirt and nobody would even know he has a drain. Anyway, there were about 10 people who attended and the marketing lady who was doing the seminar. She said that unfortunately, all the bariatric surgeons were busy last night and could make it to the seminar. Of course! Just my luck! The marketing lady (due to fibro fog I can't for the life of me remember her name!) did an excellent job of explaining the various surgeries. The Lap-Band, gastric bypass and something called a "gastric sleeve" which is almost like the bypass, but they don't do anything with the intestines like the bypass does. They cut a portion of the stomach and make it into a pouch that serves as the "new stomach." This pouch is shaped like a banana. I want the Lap-Band procedure and ONLY that. No surgery to re-route my intestines. There's a lot of risks and complications to that (like dumping syndrome because food is rapidly shunted to the small intestine from the stomach and causes terrible cramps, sweating, fainting, ect.) The gastric sleeve, even though it leaves the intestines alone and your body has normal digestion, it is non-reversible.
Now for the bad part. Money. The lady collected our forms that we had to fill out for insurance coverage and she was going to have them processed to see what our individual coverage would be, if any. I should be getting a call within a few days to go and have my initial appointment with a bariatric surgeon, dietician and psychologist and they would go over my insurance and financing. NOT counting the surgery, there are costs that are out of pocket. To enroll in their program, it's $500.00. The psychological exam is $400.00 and the three year diet and exercise program is another $1000.00. So I'm very, very nervous that I won't be able to do this. The lady said that for the severely, morbidly obese with a BMI over 40 (mine is 54), the life expectancy to 65 years of age is only 35%. I'm scared that this is my only option, as I've been dieting for two years now and my weight loss has stopped. I've even GAINED weight. And my feet are tree trunks. I just need a miracle!! I may be seeing my mom sooner than I think in Heaven!
There are financing options available, but with my husband and my bankruptcy and credit history, that option IS history. Nobody is going to loan us money. I'm just every scared and nervous and anxious that everything costs so much and I've got nothing!! I think I'm starting to hyperventilate! OK, calm down, Missy. I'll just see what happens. Please God, do your miracles!
Hope everyone has a good day and I really appreciate all the kind and loving support you have given me. I value each and everyone of you!! :0)
God bless ya,
Until next post,
Missy
Hope everything is A-OK in your world on this "hump" day of the week! When I was in school, I liked Wednesdays as it meant we were half the way there to Friday. I liked Fridays EVEN MORE, as that meant the weekend and sleeping in. Ahhh, thinking back to my youth always makes me think hard at how so many things I considered "problems" then are just a little bump on the road of life. I didn't have the fibro then, or the arthritis. I was healthy - a little on the plump side - I've battled the bulge for many, many years now. I only took an aspirin if I had a headache, which was not very often. Problems then consisted of a run in your nylon or no chap stick or lipstick on your teeth that you didn't discover until the END of the day! The problems of now are so much more serious (our crumbling economy, unemployment is up, famine, earthquakes, you get the picture!) and I am no longer the picture of health. In fact, my medication list is as long as my arm! When I fill out new patient forms and they ask what meds I'm taking I always say "see med list" as I carry a med list with me all the time. It makes life so much easier!! I highly recommend that everyone make out a medication list and stick it in your pocket or purse. You won't believe how handy it is to have!
OK, I'll get off my soap box now. Last night my hubby and I went to Banner Estrella for the lap-band seminar. My hubby has been enjoying getting out into the open air and has been coming along with me on many of our errands. I think it helps to build up his strength more. He can hide the drain under his shirt and nobody would even know he has a drain. Anyway, there were about 10 people who attended and the marketing lady who was doing the seminar. She said that unfortunately, all the bariatric surgeons were busy last night and could make it to the seminar. Of course! Just my luck! The marketing lady (due to fibro fog I can't for the life of me remember her name!) did an excellent job of explaining the various surgeries. The Lap-Band, gastric bypass and something called a "gastric sleeve" which is almost like the bypass, but they don't do anything with the intestines like the bypass does. They cut a portion of the stomach and make it into a pouch that serves as the "new stomach." This pouch is shaped like a banana. I want the Lap-Band procedure and ONLY that. No surgery to re-route my intestines. There's a lot of risks and complications to that (like dumping syndrome because food is rapidly shunted to the small intestine from the stomach and causes terrible cramps, sweating, fainting, ect.) The gastric sleeve, even though it leaves the intestines alone and your body has normal digestion, it is non-reversible.
Now for the bad part. Money. The lady collected our forms that we had to fill out for insurance coverage and she was going to have them processed to see what our individual coverage would be, if any. I should be getting a call within a few days to go and have my initial appointment with a bariatric surgeon, dietician and psychologist and they would go over my insurance and financing. NOT counting the surgery, there are costs that are out of pocket. To enroll in their program, it's $500.00. The psychological exam is $400.00 and the three year diet and exercise program is another $1000.00. So I'm very, very nervous that I won't be able to do this. The lady said that for the severely, morbidly obese with a BMI over 40 (mine is 54), the life expectancy to 65 years of age is only 35%. I'm scared that this is my only option, as I've been dieting for two years now and my weight loss has stopped. I've even GAINED weight. And my feet are tree trunks. I just need a miracle!! I may be seeing my mom sooner than I think in Heaven!
There are financing options available, but with my husband and my bankruptcy and credit history, that option IS history. Nobody is going to loan us money. I'm just every scared and nervous and anxious that everything costs so much and I've got nothing!! I think I'm starting to hyperventilate! OK, calm down, Missy. I'll just see what happens. Please God, do your miracles!
Hope everyone has a good day and I really appreciate all the kind and loving support you have given me. I value each and everyone of you!! :0)
God bless ya,
Until next post,
Missy
Monday, August 23, 2010
Down The Drain
Hello, fine friends!
I hope this post finds you all happy and as pain-free as possible. Unfortunately, for me, I've been battling severe leg/feet pain for so long now, I feel they are a part of me. I am so tired of waking up and feeling like I'd been rolled over by a steam roller. I'm so stiff, I have to sit at the side of the bed for a half hour before that first agonizing step. And I always have to use the bathroom really badly, but I've got a "bladder" of steel and I can hold it until I can painfully limp to the bathroom. When I was working as a floor nurse, I rarely had time to even breathe or have lunch, let alone use the bathroom, so I probably got my "bladder of steel" from that experience.
I guess I'm still "paying that piper" from when Frankie was in and out of the hospital this summer. That really took it out of me and my mother-in-law, who has arthritis and fibromyalgia, too. She has had rheumatoid arthritis since the age of 12! Poor thing! That is when all the fun starts with being a teenager and with running around town looking for boys (that's what I did when I was a teen, anyway!) and going to dances and just being active. I can't even begin to imagine having juvenile rheumatoid arthritis. I've always told her I really admire her for getting so much done in her life (raising three children AND working a full time job!) with the limitations of arthritis. Her hands/wrists are really bad and she has had surgery on her toes to correct them as they were laying on top of one another and posed a great infection risk. Her feet look great! I wish something could be done about her hands, though. They are crippled from the arthritis and her wrists are fused.
Anyway, we stuck it out because we love Frankie and would support him in any way we could. I would CRAWL to the hospital to see him, he is that important to me. Luckily, though, I don't have to crawl. We have a great car that takes us wherever we want to go...as long as we have gas in it!! :0) I'm just so happy that he is home and it looks like he is here to stay. Today is the surgery appointment and the million dollar question is: will he remove the drain or leave it in? We're not getting our hopes up this time. That way, we'll be pleasantly surprised if he pulls it OR we'll accept it if he doesn't pull it. What else can we do?
I took two pictures of my "patient." The first one shows Frankie with his shirt up, to show off the drain so you can have a visual idea of what the heck I'm talking about when I mention his drain. The tubing goes to the little suction bulb hanging down his left leg. He's healed up nicely from the surgery, as you can see the long incision down his belly.
The second picture is of Frankie doing what he loves most....the computer. He still is very weak and somewhat pale, as you might be able to tell from the photo. But each day gets easier and I think once the drain is out, he will feel a lot better. It's almost like an anchor weighing him down, reminding him constantly of his recent surgery and staying in the hospital for so long.
Maybe today will be THE day he can throw that blasted drain "down the drain" at his appointment!! Good riddance is what I say! Although, that drain is what made it possible for him to be at home instead of in the hospital with a partial bowel obstruction, all hooked up to the IV nutrition and the NG tube down in his stomach. But I think it's served its purpose, though, and he's had it in for two weeks now. Time to go in my humble opinion.
OK, enough talk about that. You probably have noticed I've made some changes to my blog. I found some really cute backgrounds from "Cutest Blog On The Block." The link for it is way at the top left hand corner, where their logo is. Best thing about these backgrounds is that they are FREE. My price! And they have oodles to choose from, and not just backgrounds. They have blinkies and buttons for your blog, too. So if you have a blog and want to spice it up some, head on over to "Cutest Blog On The Block." They are so easy to use and their instruction page is easy to follow. Heck, if I can install 'em, so can you! :0)
The second change I did was add a jukebox to my blog so you can listen to some great tunes while visiting my blog. If you really don't want to have it play, just take your mouse and hit the pause or stop button on the player. As you can tell, I'm a HUGE fan of Michael W. Smith and the Irish boy band, "Westlife." They ROCK!! Makes me feel like a teeny bopper again....well, not quite.....
That'll do for this post. I really hope each and every one of you is OK and getting plenty of rest, eating well, all that jazz that we SHOULD do, but never quite do. I know, I'm one of them!! I'm sticking pretty close to my diet, but I never get enough rest. My back is killing me and I can't lay on either side because then the opposite side starts in with the nerve pain that shoots down my legs. So I'm stuck on my back. Thank God for the elevation wedge I got for my legs and it also takes pressure off my lower back. If I didn't have that, I'd go nuts as I wouldn't sleep at ALL. Ho-hum, the life of one with lumbar disc disease, fibromyalgia and arthritis. It just keeps getting better and better!
God bless ya!
Until next post,
Missy
PS....Tomorrow we go to the seminar for the Lap-Band. Yay! I'm really excited to see what they have to say about it - how it works, how much weight you should lose, ect. I just want to get on the road and start it already!!!! I'm tired of waiting.....life is full of "hurry up and wait!"
I hope this post finds you all happy and as pain-free as possible. Unfortunately, for me, I've been battling severe leg/feet pain for so long now, I feel they are a part of me. I am so tired of waking up and feeling like I'd been rolled over by a steam roller. I'm so stiff, I have to sit at the side of the bed for a half hour before that first agonizing step. And I always have to use the bathroom really badly, but I've got a "bladder" of steel and I can hold it until I can painfully limp to the bathroom. When I was working as a floor nurse, I rarely had time to even breathe or have lunch, let alone use the bathroom, so I probably got my "bladder of steel" from that experience.
I guess I'm still "paying that piper" from when Frankie was in and out of the hospital this summer. That really took it out of me and my mother-in-law, who has arthritis and fibromyalgia, too. She has had rheumatoid arthritis since the age of 12! Poor thing! That is when all the fun starts with being a teenager and with running around town looking for boys (that's what I did when I was a teen, anyway!) and going to dances and just being active. I can't even begin to imagine having juvenile rheumatoid arthritis. I've always told her I really admire her for getting so much done in her life (raising three children AND working a full time job!) with the limitations of arthritis. Her hands/wrists are really bad and she has had surgery on her toes to correct them as they were laying on top of one another and posed a great infection risk. Her feet look great! I wish something could be done about her hands, though. They are crippled from the arthritis and her wrists are fused.
Anyway, we stuck it out because we love Frankie and would support him in any way we could. I would CRAWL to the hospital to see him, he is that important to me. Luckily, though, I don't have to crawl. We have a great car that takes us wherever we want to go...as long as we have gas in it!! :0) I'm just so happy that he is home and it looks like he is here to stay. Today is the surgery appointment and the million dollar question is: will he remove the drain or leave it in? We're not getting our hopes up this time. That way, we'll be pleasantly surprised if he pulls it OR we'll accept it if he doesn't pull it. What else can we do?
I took two pictures of my "patient." The first one shows Frankie with his shirt up, to show off the drain so you can have a visual idea of what the heck I'm talking about when I mention his drain. The tubing goes to the little suction bulb hanging down his left leg. He's healed up nicely from the surgery, as you can see the long incision down his belly.
The second picture is of Frankie doing what he loves most....the computer. He still is very weak and somewhat pale, as you might be able to tell from the photo. But each day gets easier and I think once the drain is out, he will feel a lot better. It's almost like an anchor weighing him down, reminding him constantly of his recent surgery and staying in the hospital for so long.
Maybe today will be THE day he can throw that blasted drain "down the drain" at his appointment!! Good riddance is what I say! Although, that drain is what made it possible for him to be at home instead of in the hospital with a partial bowel obstruction, all hooked up to the IV nutrition and the NG tube down in his stomach. But I think it's served its purpose, though, and he's had it in for two weeks now. Time to go in my humble opinion.
OK, enough talk about that. You probably have noticed I've made some changes to my blog. I found some really cute backgrounds from "Cutest Blog On The Block." The link for it is way at the top left hand corner, where their logo is. Best thing about these backgrounds is that they are FREE. My price! And they have oodles to choose from, and not just backgrounds. They have blinkies and buttons for your blog, too. So if you have a blog and want to spice it up some, head on over to "Cutest Blog On The Block." They are so easy to use and their instruction page is easy to follow. Heck, if I can install 'em, so can you! :0)
The second change I did was add a jukebox to my blog so you can listen to some great tunes while visiting my blog. If you really don't want to have it play, just take your mouse and hit the pause or stop button on the player. As you can tell, I'm a HUGE fan of Michael W. Smith and the Irish boy band, "Westlife." They ROCK!! Makes me feel like a teeny bopper again....well, not quite.....
That'll do for this post. I really hope each and every one of you is OK and getting plenty of rest, eating well, all that jazz that we SHOULD do, but never quite do. I know, I'm one of them!! I'm sticking pretty close to my diet, but I never get enough rest. My back is killing me and I can't lay on either side because then the opposite side starts in with the nerve pain that shoots down my legs. So I'm stuck on my back. Thank God for the elevation wedge I got for my legs and it also takes pressure off my lower back. If I didn't have that, I'd go nuts as I wouldn't sleep at ALL. Ho-hum, the life of one with lumbar disc disease, fibromyalgia and arthritis. It just keeps getting better and better!
God bless ya!
Until next post,
Missy
PS....Tomorrow we go to the seminar for the Lap-Band. Yay! I'm really excited to see what they have to say about it - how it works, how much weight you should lose, ect. I just want to get on the road and start it already!!!! I'm tired of waiting.....life is full of "hurry up and wait!"
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Unsettled
Hello, all!
I've noticed in all my "blog journeys" that a lot of people are having flare-ups. A lot of people are depressed, in pain, confused and just plain exhausted. I feel very "unsettled" myself. My hands are shaky, my legs are riddled with horrible spasms that take my breath away and I'm having whole body jerks at times. I can't even begin to say what medicine is responsible for the above, if any. I take so much stuff to get through the day, it's ridiculous. I made a list and counted out my medications and I take 23 medications a day!!! I kid you not. Every time I go to the doctor, seems like we are adding one more and not taking any away. It is my hope that if I get the Lap-band procedure and can lose weight, I can get rid of the hypertension and diabetes medications. Maybe even go down on the prednisone. Wouldn't that be nice? Maybe I would even get my face back, instead of looking like the surface of the moon!
My feet are still huge, absolutely NO improvement has been made. I haven't had "normal" looking feet since February, after I got the back injections. That "Baxter's nerve" thingy in my heel is still killing me, so I'm limping around the house as I can't put full weight on either leg without severe pain. I just finished putting away a few dishes and I'm so sweaty, you'd think I just came back from a 5 mile jog! I just feel absolutely helpless and useless!! Trapped inside myself. Have you ever felt that way?
My husband has been very quiet since coming home from the hospital. I've asked him a million times if something is wrong, is he upset about something, or in pain and the answer is always no. But he has changed since coming home. I think it's just post-op depression and dragging around that JP drain doesn't help. It's almost like you can't forget about the surgery and move on while you still have a drain pulling you down!! Tomorrow he has the surgeon's appointment and maybe he can be rid of the drain. It still is draining a little bit of fluid, but the color hasn't changed nor does it have that horrible smell before he went into the hospital for the pseudomonas infection. I hope this mood of his lifts soon. Between that and my feeling "unsettled", I'm a nervous wreak!! I hope this feeling I have is just a reaction to everything that has ALREADY happened, NOT what is yet to come. I can't take much more.....I'm tapped out!! Filled to the top!
Well, it's almost time for my luxurious afternoon siesta. I'll put my feet up, get comfy cozy and "read" my book....with my eyes closed! That's what has been happening lately. I go to read and the next thing I know, the book is on the floor and two hours have passed. And I still feel just as tired after as I did before my nap! Gosh, I love this damn fibromyalgia. It just makes you feel so good!!! ARGH!!!!!!!!
I'm sorry about this post. As you can tell, I'm in "fibro fog" and can't be held responsible for my actions..LOL! Things will be OK, I keep telling myself. They just have to be.
Hope you all are doing OK.
Until next post,
Missy
I've noticed in all my "blog journeys" that a lot of people are having flare-ups. A lot of people are depressed, in pain, confused and just plain exhausted. I feel very "unsettled" myself. My hands are shaky, my legs are riddled with horrible spasms that take my breath away and I'm having whole body jerks at times. I can't even begin to say what medicine is responsible for the above, if any. I take so much stuff to get through the day, it's ridiculous. I made a list and counted out my medications and I take 23 medications a day!!! I kid you not. Every time I go to the doctor, seems like we are adding one more and not taking any away. It is my hope that if I get the Lap-band procedure and can lose weight, I can get rid of the hypertension and diabetes medications. Maybe even go down on the prednisone. Wouldn't that be nice? Maybe I would even get my face back, instead of looking like the surface of the moon!
My feet are still huge, absolutely NO improvement has been made. I haven't had "normal" looking feet since February, after I got the back injections. That "Baxter's nerve" thingy in my heel is still killing me, so I'm limping around the house as I can't put full weight on either leg without severe pain. I just finished putting away a few dishes and I'm so sweaty, you'd think I just came back from a 5 mile jog! I just feel absolutely helpless and useless!! Trapped inside myself. Have you ever felt that way?
My husband has been very quiet since coming home from the hospital. I've asked him a million times if something is wrong, is he upset about something, or in pain and the answer is always no. But he has changed since coming home. I think it's just post-op depression and dragging around that JP drain doesn't help. It's almost like you can't forget about the surgery and move on while you still have a drain pulling you down!! Tomorrow he has the surgeon's appointment and maybe he can be rid of the drain. It still is draining a little bit of fluid, but the color hasn't changed nor does it have that horrible smell before he went into the hospital for the pseudomonas infection. I hope this mood of his lifts soon. Between that and my feeling "unsettled", I'm a nervous wreak!! I hope this feeling I have is just a reaction to everything that has ALREADY happened, NOT what is yet to come. I can't take much more.....I'm tapped out!! Filled to the top!
Well, it's almost time for my luxurious afternoon siesta. I'll put my feet up, get comfy cozy and "read" my book....with my eyes closed! That's what has been happening lately. I go to read and the next thing I know, the book is on the floor and two hours have passed. And I still feel just as tired after as I did before my nap! Gosh, I love this damn fibromyalgia. It just makes you feel so good!!! ARGH!!!!!!!!
I'm sorry about this post. As you can tell, I'm in "fibro fog" and can't be held responsible for my actions..LOL! Things will be OK, I keep telling myself. They just have to be.
Hope you all are doing OK.
Until next post,
Missy
Friday, August 20, 2010
"Paying The Piper"
Howdy, everyone!
My father would always say, "time to pay the piper" and I never could quite grasp that concept until I got older and contracted fibromyalgia. Now I feel like I'm "paying the piper" ALL the time for EVERYTHING I do! The events of this summer are all starting to hit me now. I was on "auto pilot" for a great part of the summer, during Frankie's surgery and subsequent hospitalizations. Now it feels like my "auto pilot" has bailed out on me and all that's left is severe exhaustion. I've even too tired to feel tired. Every bone and muscle aches all the way down into my inner core. No matter what I do or what I take, it doesn't matter.
Yesterday I went to the foot doctor because I was having severe heel and arch pain in my left foot. I had plantar fascitis a few years back and thought that is what this is now. The doctor doesn't think so, he thinks it's an inflammation of "Baxter's nerve." What I wanna know is WHO is Baxter and why is HIS nerve in MY body? LOL.... Anyway, all kidding aside, he gave me a shot in my heel area (ouch!) and I see him again in two weeks for another shot. Since I'm diabetic, he also is going to trim away at my ingrown big toe nail and that will help with balance. He said I do a good job at clipping my nails. This surprised me very much as I can barely SEE my nails, let alone clip 'em correctly!
Frankie is doing well, just very tired and weak. Holed up in the hospital day after day will do that to you. He's glad to be at home, in his own bed with his lovely wife at his side. (That would be me!) His drain is still draining, but not as much and it has no smell now, which is absolutely heavenly. Before, it smelled like something from Hell that had creeped up. Pseudomonas infections do have a weird smell - sometimes it's a fruity type smell and other times it smells like spoiled soil. He will be seeing the surgeon on Monday and dare we hope the drain will be removed? I hope so! But I have been very diligent in taking care of it - the dressing, flushing and emptying. I've sanitized everything - including Frankie! LOL....
Today we went to see Frankie's pain specialist. The Oxy IR that he was on for breakthrough pain just wasn't enough and he was taking the maximum dosage. He has pain in his abdomen where the drain enters the skin and on the right side of his abdomen. His legs aren't too bad anymore because he hasn't had the Gleevec since the middle part of June. That was placed on hold because of the surgery and now because of the infection in his drain. Anyway, in the hospital they had him on Percocet, and it actually was working, so they sent him home on enough until we could get to the pain specialist. Frankie's specialist is so incredibly nice and caring - he said that "if it works, we'll continue that" He didn't want to increase the Fentanyl patch because he believes this abdomen pain is temporary and as soon as the drain is out, he will feel better.
I feel just absolutely wrung out. Even breathing is an effort I'm too tired to take. And this heat just drags on and on. I can't wait for winter to come and here in AZ, winters are great!! All sunshine and beautiful weather to get out and walk and do things that you enjoy doing.
Well, that's all the news here. I hope you all have a blessed weekend and spend some much needed time with family and friends. Eat well, get plenty of rest and....yeah, right! This coming from me? The girl who loves fast foods and doughnuts? LOL.... Now, that was the OLD me. The NEW me is going to go through this lap band procedure and eat right and exercise as much as I can handle. I can't wait to start my new adventure!!
Love ya all!
Until next post,
Missy
My father would always say, "time to pay the piper" and I never could quite grasp that concept until I got older and contracted fibromyalgia. Now I feel like I'm "paying the piper" ALL the time for EVERYTHING I do! The events of this summer are all starting to hit me now. I was on "auto pilot" for a great part of the summer, during Frankie's surgery and subsequent hospitalizations. Now it feels like my "auto pilot" has bailed out on me and all that's left is severe exhaustion. I've even too tired to feel tired. Every bone and muscle aches all the way down into my inner core. No matter what I do or what I take, it doesn't matter.
Yesterday I went to the foot doctor because I was having severe heel and arch pain in my left foot. I had plantar fascitis a few years back and thought that is what this is now. The doctor doesn't think so, he thinks it's an inflammation of "Baxter's nerve." What I wanna know is WHO is Baxter and why is HIS nerve in MY body? LOL.... Anyway, all kidding aside, he gave me a shot in my heel area (ouch!) and I see him again in two weeks for another shot. Since I'm diabetic, he also is going to trim away at my ingrown big toe nail and that will help with balance. He said I do a good job at clipping my nails. This surprised me very much as I can barely SEE my nails, let alone clip 'em correctly!
Frankie is doing well, just very tired and weak. Holed up in the hospital day after day will do that to you. He's glad to be at home, in his own bed with his lovely wife at his side. (That would be me!) His drain is still draining, but not as much and it has no smell now, which is absolutely heavenly. Before, it smelled like something from Hell that had creeped up. Pseudomonas infections do have a weird smell - sometimes it's a fruity type smell and other times it smells like spoiled soil. He will be seeing the surgeon on Monday and dare we hope the drain will be removed? I hope so! But I have been very diligent in taking care of it - the dressing, flushing and emptying. I've sanitized everything - including Frankie! LOL....
Today we went to see Frankie's pain specialist. The Oxy IR that he was on for breakthrough pain just wasn't enough and he was taking the maximum dosage. He has pain in his abdomen where the drain enters the skin and on the right side of his abdomen. His legs aren't too bad anymore because he hasn't had the Gleevec since the middle part of June. That was placed on hold because of the surgery and now because of the infection in his drain. Anyway, in the hospital they had him on Percocet, and it actually was working, so they sent him home on enough until we could get to the pain specialist. Frankie's specialist is so incredibly nice and caring - he said that "if it works, we'll continue that" He didn't want to increase the Fentanyl patch because he believes this abdomen pain is temporary and as soon as the drain is out, he will feel better.
I feel just absolutely wrung out. Even breathing is an effort I'm too tired to take. And this heat just drags on and on. I can't wait for winter to come and here in AZ, winters are great!! All sunshine and beautiful weather to get out and walk and do things that you enjoy doing.
Well, that's all the news here. I hope you all have a blessed weekend and spend some much needed time with family and friends. Eat well, get plenty of rest and....yeah, right! This coming from me? The girl who loves fast foods and doughnuts? LOL.... Now, that was the OLD me. The NEW me is going to go through this lap band procedure and eat right and exercise as much as I can handle. I can't wait to start my new adventure!!
Love ya all!
Until next post,
Missy
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Down Day
Good morning (or evening-depending on where you are) my dear friends!
It's kind of funny in the way that I had started this post a few days ago and had it interrupted by my husband's medical crisis and readmission to the hospital. I put it on hold and can just now finally come back to it and finish it.
I have had such a wide array of emotions lately. The biggest of them being depression. I'm on two anti-depressants for the fibro and yet I still am depressed! Go figure. When I look back on my life, in my eyes, I just don't see much that I've accomplished. I'm not world famous for some invention, I'm not Mother Theresa (not even close!) nor have I written that New York Times Bestseller novel I always promised myself I'd do. I love writing and it is my main mode of communication. Growing up with a speech impediment, you find anyway to express yourself - without speaking - and my mode was written word. Now, I HAVE written a lot of poems, but that's about it. And now just recently, I've started this blog. Hard to believe I've been blogging for almost three months now. So much has happened in those three months, it's hard to believe!
My husband and I have had such a hard time of it these past few years. We've never lived alone - just him and I. We lived with my parents for ten years because they couldn't afford rent AND to eat, and we couldn't afford our rent, their food bill AND our own bills, so we decided to consolidate households and we lived together until my mom died in 2008. Now my dad is living in a senior apartment complex in Michigan and my hubby and I are living with HIS parents now, because I can't work due to my low back issues and the fibro and my husband can't work because of his cancer and the medication to treat it causes severe bone and joint pain. He is on disability - they approved him the first time. Me-I've applied, been rejected, filed an appeal, been rejected again, and am now waiting for a hearing. I don't know if my lawyer is real or not, I've never seen her face-to-face. She only does business over the phone. What's up with that? Do I know how to pick 'em or what? I haven't heard from her in months and with all the drama going on with first my dad and then my hubby, I've let things slip a little. If only the folks at Social Security could see me and how I function....or DON'T function....it would be a different story. I don't know what hurts worse on me - my left foot or right calf - and I have this pain on a daily basis, regardless of all the medications I take. It just seems like pain, lack of good sleep and keeping my husband OUT of the hospital are all my life is made up to do. Anyone ever feel like that sometimes?
OK, I'll knock it off now. We have a roof over our head, and a very nice one, too. I even have something I've wanted my whole life....an awesome sister-in-law and brother-in-law!! I thank Frankie for sharing them with me. :0) Even if I were to be approved for disability, it would make my life HARDER (yes, you read right) as then I'd lose my state health benefits because we would be over the limit on earnings. So my disability check would go for doctor's appointments, labs and medications. I just feel so bad for being a "leech" on my in-laws for two years now. I wish I could contribute in some way. I can't even do housework with how bad my back is and now my feet with the plantar fascitis. Every time I stand, it takes my breath away! I know my in-laws are itchin' to get into their Winnebago and hit the high road, but with my hubby in and out of the hospital so often now, they are afraid to go and leave us for any period of time. It just is so unfair! When will we get a break? ARGH!!!!!!!
OK, sorry. I really will knock it off now! On Thursday I go to the foot doctor to see what can be done about my in-grown toenail on my right foot and the severe pain in my left foot. So we'll take care of that. My hubby is doing better, no more fever, but he is on potent IV antibiotics. Last night they took him down to radiology to look at the drain and possibly replace it, but it didn't need replacement. They injected it with a clot buster medication and it's working fine. I flushed it once a day when he was home....that's all I could do with the limited amount of flushes I had. Even Tim was having a hard time getting them at the home health agency! He said they only gave out flushes to patients with PICC lines or other IV ports. NOT drains. What kind of crazy, stupid arrangements is THAT? If insurance companies would just listen to how stupid their rules are, I'll bet they would change some of them!
Now I'm worried that my state insurance plan won't cover the LapBand procedure I want to undergo. I go to that seminar Aug. 24th and then make an appt. with the bariatric surgeon. I read on the LapBand website that some insurances won't cover it and they have these financial plans you can apply for. But with our credit history, nobody is crazy enough to approve our application! And I just feel like this is my final hope. I've quit losing weight, in fact now I'm gaining again! The last few doc appointments I've had shown an upward rise on the weight scales! And I'm not doing anything differently or cheating by eating a whole Sara Lee cake! I think it's water retention, as my feet are still very swollen. If I could have this LapBand surgery, I believe it would help in so many ways. With the water retention, my back (maybe I could even work again!) and it would take a lot of weight off of my legs and feet. I'm almost afraid to get my hopes up when I see the surgeon because I'm fearful they will just come crashing back down around my swollen ankles! But nothing ventured, nothing gained as the saying goes. Just pray that my insurance covers this operation!!
I guess I'll close this post and get on with the day and see where it takes me. I'll see my hubby around noon, as I noticed that the chances of getting a good parking space is right around then. I've had ample opportunity to study the parking lot, that's for sure! I have it memorized by now. My husband just HAS to get better and stay out of that place for longer than a week!!
Thank you for reading this and listening to me blather on about my problems. Hope I didn't bore you too much. I really appreciate all my followers and all my friends. If not for you and my family & the Good Lord above, I would have given up long ago.
Have a good day and remember to have some fun, too. Life isn't all worries and work....THANK GOD!!! I keep telling myself this over & over....
Love ya all,
Until next post,
Missy
It's kind of funny in the way that I had started this post a few days ago and had it interrupted by my husband's medical crisis and readmission to the hospital. I put it on hold and can just now finally come back to it and finish it.
I have had such a wide array of emotions lately. The biggest of them being depression. I'm on two anti-depressants for the fibro and yet I still am depressed! Go figure. When I look back on my life, in my eyes, I just don't see much that I've accomplished. I'm not world famous for some invention, I'm not Mother Theresa (not even close!) nor have I written that New York Times Bestseller novel I always promised myself I'd do. I love writing and it is my main mode of communication. Growing up with a speech impediment, you find anyway to express yourself - without speaking - and my mode was written word. Now, I HAVE written a lot of poems, but that's about it. And now just recently, I've started this blog. Hard to believe I've been blogging for almost three months now. So much has happened in those three months, it's hard to believe!
My husband and I have had such a hard time of it these past few years. We've never lived alone - just him and I. We lived with my parents for ten years because they couldn't afford rent AND to eat, and we couldn't afford our rent, their food bill AND our own bills, so we decided to consolidate households and we lived together until my mom died in 2008. Now my dad is living in a senior apartment complex in Michigan and my hubby and I are living with HIS parents now, because I can't work due to my low back issues and the fibro and my husband can't work because of his cancer and the medication to treat it causes severe bone and joint pain. He is on disability - they approved him the first time. Me-I've applied, been rejected, filed an appeal, been rejected again, and am now waiting for a hearing. I don't know if my lawyer is real or not, I've never seen her face-to-face. She only does business over the phone. What's up with that? Do I know how to pick 'em or what? I haven't heard from her in months and with all the drama going on with first my dad and then my hubby, I've let things slip a little. If only the folks at Social Security could see me and how I function....or DON'T function....it would be a different story. I don't know what hurts worse on me - my left foot or right calf - and I have this pain on a daily basis, regardless of all the medications I take. It just seems like pain, lack of good sleep and keeping my husband OUT of the hospital are all my life is made up to do. Anyone ever feel like that sometimes?
OK, I'll knock it off now. We have a roof over our head, and a very nice one, too. I even have something I've wanted my whole life....an awesome sister-in-law and brother-in-law!! I thank Frankie for sharing them with me. :0) Even if I were to be approved for disability, it would make my life HARDER (yes, you read right) as then I'd lose my state health benefits because we would be over the limit on earnings. So my disability check would go for doctor's appointments, labs and medications. I just feel so bad for being a "leech" on my in-laws for two years now. I wish I could contribute in some way. I can't even do housework with how bad my back is and now my feet with the plantar fascitis. Every time I stand, it takes my breath away! I know my in-laws are itchin' to get into their Winnebago and hit the high road, but with my hubby in and out of the hospital so often now, they are afraid to go and leave us for any period of time. It just is so unfair! When will we get a break? ARGH!!!!!!!
OK, sorry. I really will knock it off now! On Thursday I go to the foot doctor to see what can be done about my in-grown toenail on my right foot and the severe pain in my left foot. So we'll take care of that. My hubby is doing better, no more fever, but he is on potent IV antibiotics. Last night they took him down to radiology to look at the drain and possibly replace it, but it didn't need replacement. They injected it with a clot buster medication and it's working fine. I flushed it once a day when he was home....that's all I could do with the limited amount of flushes I had. Even Tim was having a hard time getting them at the home health agency! He said they only gave out flushes to patients with PICC lines or other IV ports. NOT drains. What kind of crazy, stupid arrangements is THAT? If insurance companies would just listen to how stupid their rules are, I'll bet they would change some of them!
Now I'm worried that my state insurance plan won't cover the LapBand procedure I want to undergo. I go to that seminar Aug. 24th and then make an appt. with the bariatric surgeon. I read on the LapBand website that some insurances won't cover it and they have these financial plans you can apply for. But with our credit history, nobody is crazy enough to approve our application! And I just feel like this is my final hope. I've quit losing weight, in fact now I'm gaining again! The last few doc appointments I've had shown an upward rise on the weight scales! And I'm not doing anything differently or cheating by eating a whole Sara Lee cake! I think it's water retention, as my feet are still very swollen. If I could have this LapBand surgery, I believe it would help in so many ways. With the water retention, my back (maybe I could even work again!) and it would take a lot of weight off of my legs and feet. I'm almost afraid to get my hopes up when I see the surgeon because I'm fearful they will just come crashing back down around my swollen ankles! But nothing ventured, nothing gained as the saying goes. Just pray that my insurance covers this operation!!
I guess I'll close this post and get on with the day and see where it takes me. I'll see my hubby around noon, as I noticed that the chances of getting a good parking space is right around then. I've had ample opportunity to study the parking lot, that's for sure! I have it memorized by now. My husband just HAS to get better and stay out of that place for longer than a week!!
Thank you for reading this and listening to me blather on about my problems. Hope I didn't bore you too much. I really appreciate all my followers and all my friends. If not for you and my family & the Good Lord above, I would have given up long ago.
Have a good day and remember to have some fun, too. Life isn't all worries and work....THANK GOD!!! I keep telling myself this over & over....
Love ya all,
Until next post,
Missy
Sunday, August 8, 2010
So Far, So Good!
Happy Sunday, everyone!
Hope it's been a good one for you. As the post title says, so far, so good with my hubby! We've found a solution that has worked the past few mornings for his nausea in the mornings. You'll never believe this, but it's chicken broth with saltine crackers! And he has his cereal and milk for lunch. Isn't that a scream? He did vomit a little last night, but nothing like he used to. So that means that his stomach is NOT retaining its contents and the intestines are finally doing their job. Thank the Heavens above!! All those LONG days in the hospital are finally paying off. That and the Jackson-Pratt drain he has connected has made a big improvement, since the hematoma inside the intestine has a someplace to drain instead of inside his stomach and creating another bowel obstruction, because the fluid can't go past the hematoma. I sure do hope that sucker is getting smaller by now. We'll know more when he has the CT scan on Wednesday.
Frankie has been so incredibly tired and sleepy lately. He hasn't even fought me for the computer or to drive the car! He says he will drive again when his drain is out. He hates going out in public with that thing hanging down and I don't blame him. I wouldn't want to go out with a bulb containing bodily fluid dangling down either!!! I think he is so tired because he didn't sleep very well in the hospital and now is "pay-back time" AND because he is anemic. I brought that up with his primary care doctor and he said he would leave that issue up to his oncologist, which we see on Monday. Doctors! They are so darned specialized now they have you going here and there for different things. So I will bring it up with the oncologist, then, on Monday. We've started him (and me) out on Super Complex vitamin B and sublingual vitamin B supplements to build immunity and energy. It's too soon to tell, but I think I'm starting to feel a tiny bit energetic. Not too much, yet, though.....I don't feel like climbing up to the roof of the house or anything..geez, doesn't that make a hysterical image in your mind??? Hehehe!
I've been hanging in there. Now that things are starting to level out for Frankie, it's all starting to hit me now. All the long days in the hospital with him, doing errands, lugging my walker in and out of the trunk and all the long nights without Frankie and all the worry.....it's all catching up with me and putting me into quite a flare. My back has been just horrible. And to make matters worse, I can't use my TENS too much on it because my sweat mixes with the conductive gel I use and has created an itchy rash on my whole backside! I've been just clawing at my self and I can't help it, it itches so bad! So I've been using this expensive cream my dear sister gave me and that helps the itch and brings it down to a dull roar. So how I'm working the TENS is by placing the electrodes high up on my back where there is NO rash and it's been working OK.
My legs have been pretty bad, too. They feel like Jell-o when I stand and are weak and painful with cramps. I've upped my Magnesium supplement with some relief. I also use my "Myoflex" cream on it and that really helps. But with all the driving I've been doing, it's no wonder my right leg (the one I work the accelerator with) is more sore than the left. Stop lights are the killers for me, especially those that seem to be painted red. My leg will cramp up if the light is too long, so I have to rub out the cramp with my hand until the light turns green. I tell ya, it sucks to be me sometimes!!!
I don't know if I mentioned this previously-and if I have-please forgive me! We'll blame it on "fibro fog." I signed up for the August 24th seminar for the lap-band procedure. My hubby is far along in his recovery that we can move ahead and I am sooooo ready! I'm so tired of laying on my back all the time. I'm hoping that just the fact of losing a lot of weight will help my back so much it won't need surgery! Wouldn't that be nice? I really don't want surgery on my back, but I'll do it if I must just to get back to work and my life again. After the seminar, I'll make an appointment with the bariatric surgeon and go from there. Please pray my insurance will cover this. I hope, I hope, I hope!!!!
Well, that's the news from our neck of the woods. Hope your neck of the woods is doing OK, too. Thank you for everything...for your thoughts, prayers, well wishes, comments.....your friendship and reading my blog!! I appreciate it ALL!!
God bless ya,
Until next post,
Missy
Hope it's been a good one for you. As the post title says, so far, so good with my hubby! We've found a solution that has worked the past few mornings for his nausea in the mornings. You'll never believe this, but it's chicken broth with saltine crackers! And he has his cereal and milk for lunch. Isn't that a scream? He did vomit a little last night, but nothing like he used to. So that means that his stomach is NOT retaining its contents and the intestines are finally doing their job. Thank the Heavens above!! All those LONG days in the hospital are finally paying off. That and the Jackson-Pratt drain he has connected has made a big improvement, since the hematoma inside the intestine has a someplace to drain instead of inside his stomach and creating another bowel obstruction, because the fluid can't go past the hematoma. I sure do hope that sucker is getting smaller by now. We'll know more when he has the CT scan on Wednesday.
Frankie has been so incredibly tired and sleepy lately. He hasn't even fought me for the computer or to drive the car! He says he will drive again when his drain is out. He hates going out in public with that thing hanging down and I don't blame him. I wouldn't want to go out with a bulb containing bodily fluid dangling down either!!! I think he is so tired because he didn't sleep very well in the hospital and now is "pay-back time" AND because he is anemic. I brought that up with his primary care doctor and he said he would leave that issue up to his oncologist, which we see on Monday. Doctors! They are so darned specialized now they have you going here and there for different things. So I will bring it up with the oncologist, then, on Monday. We've started him (and me) out on Super Complex vitamin B and sublingual vitamin B supplements to build immunity and energy. It's too soon to tell, but I think I'm starting to feel a tiny bit energetic. Not too much, yet, though.....I don't feel like climbing up to the roof of the house or anything..geez, doesn't that make a hysterical image in your mind??? Hehehe!
I've been hanging in there. Now that things are starting to level out for Frankie, it's all starting to hit me now. All the long days in the hospital with him, doing errands, lugging my walker in and out of the trunk and all the long nights without Frankie and all the worry.....it's all catching up with me and putting me into quite a flare. My back has been just horrible. And to make matters worse, I can't use my TENS too much on it because my sweat mixes with the conductive gel I use and has created an itchy rash on my whole backside! I've been just clawing at my self and I can't help it, it itches so bad! So I've been using this expensive cream my dear sister gave me and that helps the itch and brings it down to a dull roar. So how I'm working the TENS is by placing the electrodes high up on my back where there is NO rash and it's been working OK.
My legs have been pretty bad, too. They feel like Jell-o when I stand and are weak and painful with cramps. I've upped my Magnesium supplement with some relief. I also use my "Myoflex" cream on it and that really helps. But with all the driving I've been doing, it's no wonder my right leg (the one I work the accelerator with) is more sore than the left. Stop lights are the killers for me, especially those that seem to be painted red. My leg will cramp up if the light is too long, so I have to rub out the cramp with my hand until the light turns green. I tell ya, it sucks to be me sometimes!!!
I don't know if I mentioned this previously-and if I have-please forgive me! We'll blame it on "fibro fog." I signed up for the August 24th seminar for the lap-band procedure. My hubby is far along in his recovery that we can move ahead and I am sooooo ready! I'm so tired of laying on my back all the time. I'm hoping that just the fact of losing a lot of weight will help my back so much it won't need surgery! Wouldn't that be nice? I really don't want surgery on my back, but I'll do it if I must just to get back to work and my life again. After the seminar, I'll make an appointment with the bariatric surgeon and go from there. Please pray my insurance will cover this. I hope, I hope, I hope!!!!
Well, that's the news from our neck of the woods. Hope your neck of the woods is doing OK, too. Thank you for everything...for your thoughts, prayers, well wishes, comments.....your friendship and reading my blog!! I appreciate it ALL!!
God bless ya,
Until next post,
Missy
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Surgeon's Appointment
Howdy, everyone!
This is just a quick post to let you know how things went at the appointment with Frankie's surgeon today. He examined Frankie's abdomen and is aware of all the problems Frankie is having with nausea, vomiting and diarrhea. His suggestions were to get some Gatorade or anything with electrolytes in it and drink it on down! And he was keeping the drain in, much to Frankie's disappointment. The doc said maybe for another two weeks. He wants Frankie to have a CT scan next week and he'll go from there. He reported to us that Frankie's bowels were just "a huge mess" of scar tissue & adhesions. That is why he is having so many complications. And the drain is actually the reason why Frankie is OUT of the hospital. It helps to keep the bowel open by draining that hematoma that is inside there.
The visiting nurse, Tim, will come by tomorrow and hopefully set me up with some supplies for the drain. Flushes, dressings, that sort of thing. I feel in my element and my nursing skills are coming back and becoming sharper. I miss my job so badly I could scream!! When my husband was in the hospital, I'd see the nurses work and it took me back to when I could do that. Maybe I still can one day.
I signed up for the lap band seminar on August 24th. After that, I'll make an appointment with a bariatric surgeon and proceed ahead. Please pray that my insurance will pay for it as that is the only way I can do it. It definitely is of medical necessity. I read some of their success stories and this one lady lost 150 pounds over nine months. That would be FANTASTIC if I could do that!! I could return to work, hopefully. So wish me luck!!
Alrighty, that is all my news. Hope things are going well in your neck of the woods. :0)
God bless you all!
Missy
This is just a quick post to let you know how things went at the appointment with Frankie's surgeon today. He examined Frankie's abdomen and is aware of all the problems Frankie is having with nausea, vomiting and diarrhea. His suggestions were to get some Gatorade or anything with electrolytes in it and drink it on down! And he was keeping the drain in, much to Frankie's disappointment. The doc said maybe for another two weeks. He wants Frankie to have a CT scan next week and he'll go from there. He reported to us that Frankie's bowels were just "a huge mess" of scar tissue & adhesions. That is why he is having so many complications. And the drain is actually the reason why Frankie is OUT of the hospital. It helps to keep the bowel open by draining that hematoma that is inside there.
The visiting nurse, Tim, will come by tomorrow and hopefully set me up with some supplies for the drain. Flushes, dressings, that sort of thing. I feel in my element and my nursing skills are coming back and becoming sharper. I miss my job so badly I could scream!! When my husband was in the hospital, I'd see the nurses work and it took me back to when I could do that. Maybe I still can one day.
I signed up for the lap band seminar on August 24th. After that, I'll make an appointment with a bariatric surgeon and proceed ahead. Please pray that my insurance will pay for it as that is the only way I can do it. It definitely is of medical necessity. I read some of their success stories and this one lady lost 150 pounds over nine months. That would be FANTASTIC if I could do that!! I could return to work, hopefully. So wish me luck!!
Alrighty, that is all my news. Hope things are going well in your neck of the woods. :0)
God bless you all!
Missy
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Code BROWN
Aye-yi-ya!!!!!!! That about sums it up! The man who always is constipated up to his eyeballs and requires enough stool softeners to choke a horse (seriously, before the surgery, he used to take eight (8) stool softeners a day and he STILL would require something more like Miralax to get things going!) has opened up the "colonic" flood gates and we had quite the mess this morning. I don't need to get graphic, nor do I want to re-live the experience again. You get the picture. I think one of the antibiotics Frankie received in the hospital has given him diarrhea. He's gone twice yesterday and once so far this morning. This morning was the worst. The poor guy had to completely strip and hop into the shower, abdominal drain and all, to clean up. My mother-in-law is so nice, she helped me clean up the mess in the bathroom. She mopped the floor and is now in the process of washing clothes. We leave pretty soon to go to the doctor and I'm a tad worried about what to do if he has to "go" in the car. I'm taking plenty of towels and padding him down! Unless anyone else has an idea in the next hour or so!! I've already given him 2 anti-diarrheal pills. I hope I don't, in the long run, end up constipating him again. I'll drive down that road later, though.
We finally got the blood pressure problem licked, I think. I've been taking it every four hours and he's had a good reading ever since he came home from the hospital. And NO temperature. Poor guy, he probably feels like he's back in the hospital with me hovering like a helicopter over him! I can't help being a mother hen, though. And a nurse mother hen at that!!!
Other than what I've described above, we've have a good first night home. I was nervous all night and didn't sleep a lot, and I kept making sure Frankie was still breathing (that nurse in me, again!) so today I'm paying the price for not sleeping. I can't wear my TENS yet until I get new electrodes, so after we leave the doctor appointment, we'll stop off and get some at Active Forever. This morning I was sooooo stiff, I had to sit at the side of the bed for 45 minutes to "loosen" up enough to go to the bathroom, and then Frankie had his diarrhea episode then so I couldn't use our bathroom anyway! I had to use my in-laws. Thank goodness for two bathrooms! My right leg is getting worse with the numbness, pins and needles and pain. I don't think my medication regime is working anymore, so we'll have to "tweak" it when I see my doctor again. I don't know what more we can do, but there has to be something!!
As soon as I get "humpty dumpty" Frankie put back together again and STAYS put back together, then I'm going to go to the lap-band seminar required by the bariatric doctor. I can't even see him until I attend the seminar first. So I'd love to get that going, but I want to make sure Frankie is OK first as I can't go through two big things at once right now. I'm so run down from him being in the hospital for so long and this whole ordeal. Frankie and I have started on B vitamins to help with energy. I wish I could strap a motor on my back or something to help me get going...wouldn't that be nice? I just want to get the lap band procedure done and over with and start losing weight. I'll bet I'll feel tons (excuse the pun!) better and maybe won't even need surgery. I hope so! And I can get back to work again and my husband and I can rent an apartment and be out on our own again. That's my game plan, anyway. I hope it works out like that. So far I haven't had a good track record with things working out with plan A. It's always plan B or C I have to rely on! Then again, sometimes plan B or C is the better plan anyway. :0)
Alrighty, gotta run (again, excuse the pun....me, run?! That's NOT a pretty sight!) and get ready to take Frankie to his appointment. Hope you all are happy and as pain free as you can get.
Thank you so much for all your love and support, everyone. I've gained a lot through my blog sessions; I hope you have as well.
God bless!
Missy
We finally got the blood pressure problem licked, I think. I've been taking it every four hours and he's had a good reading ever since he came home from the hospital. And NO temperature. Poor guy, he probably feels like he's back in the hospital with me hovering like a helicopter over him! I can't help being a mother hen, though. And a nurse mother hen at that!!!
Other than what I've described above, we've have a good first night home. I was nervous all night and didn't sleep a lot, and I kept making sure Frankie was still breathing (that nurse in me, again!) so today I'm paying the price for not sleeping. I can't wear my TENS yet until I get new electrodes, so after we leave the doctor appointment, we'll stop off and get some at Active Forever. This morning I was sooooo stiff, I had to sit at the side of the bed for 45 minutes to "loosen" up enough to go to the bathroom, and then Frankie had his diarrhea episode then so I couldn't use our bathroom anyway! I had to use my in-laws. Thank goodness for two bathrooms! My right leg is getting worse with the numbness, pins and needles and pain. I don't think my medication regime is working anymore, so we'll have to "tweak" it when I see my doctor again. I don't know what more we can do, but there has to be something!!
As soon as I get "humpty dumpty" Frankie put back together again and STAYS put back together, then I'm going to go to the lap-band seminar required by the bariatric doctor. I can't even see him until I attend the seminar first. So I'd love to get that going, but I want to make sure Frankie is OK first as I can't go through two big things at once right now. I'm so run down from him being in the hospital for so long and this whole ordeal. Frankie and I have started on B vitamins to help with energy. I wish I could strap a motor on my back or something to help me get going...wouldn't that be nice? I just want to get the lap band procedure done and over with and start losing weight. I'll bet I'll feel tons (excuse the pun!) better and maybe won't even need surgery. I hope so! And I can get back to work again and my husband and I can rent an apartment and be out on our own again. That's my game plan, anyway. I hope it works out like that. So far I haven't had a good track record with things working out with plan A. It's always plan B or C I have to rely on! Then again, sometimes plan B or C is the better plan anyway. :0)
Alrighty, gotta run (again, excuse the pun....me, run?! That's NOT a pretty sight!) and get ready to take Frankie to his appointment. Hope you all are happy and as pain free as you can get.
Thank you so much for all your love and support, everyone. I've gained a lot through my blog sessions; I hope you have as well.
God bless!
Missy
Sunday, July 25, 2010
GIMME FOOD!
Howdy, all!
Are you sitting down? Ready for some GREAT news? Frankie can eat again!! On Friday he had his NG tube clamped and they started him on clear liquids. Because he doesn't like fruit (but he'll consume sweet and sour chicken like it's going out of style or have oatmeal with raisins but yet he doesn't like fruit!) the clear liquid diet was NOT made with Frankie in mind. They sent up cherry Jell-o, mango ice popcicle, apple juice, chicken broth and coffee. The only thing he liked was the chicken broth, but because he hadn't eaten in a month, it was too rich for him. So he had half of that and my mother-in-law made him some iced tea and he gluggled that down like a man just coming in from a 40 day trek out in the desert!
Yesterday (Saturday), they started him on full liquids since he did really well with keeping everything down from Friday. He had a little bit of nausea, but I think some of it is in his head since he hasn't had food in so long and the previous trials at it failed, his brain could be causing the nausea because its so used to feeling it! The brain is very mysterious! So we got his mind onto other things - his pocket poker game- and he was OK. He also gets nausea meds with his Morphine now. We got him off the Dilaudid (Thank God!) and onto the Morphine. I hope to wean him off of that before he comes home. He can continue the same meds his pain specialist in Scottsdale has him on at home, they worked just fine! He still is in significant pain in his legs still, even though he has been off the Gleevec for a month. Maybe his pain is NOT from the Gleevec. Oh well, that investigation will have to come later. When Frankie gets out of the hospital, we are working on ME next. I want to start the process of getting that lap band so I can start losing weight to feel better and maybe I can work again. Isn't THAT a novel thought? I haven't worked in two years and I'll have to take a nursing refresher course if I don't work in five years. So I have three years to get in tip-top shape!!! So Schranz Boot Camp, here I come!! LOL!!
Back to Frankie...according to the CT scan of Friday night, the hematoma in his abdomen has shrunk some, but not enough to remove the drain yet. At least he will be getting rid of the NG tube. I'll take my camera and get a picture of this milestone. I have all the pictures in a folder called "Frankie's Recovery." I'll even get a picture of him eating dinner tonight; that will be a sight I haven't seen in some time!!!
Well, better get to the hospital to see my man. I need to keep him motivated. Walk. Sit in the chair. Take a short nap. Repeat process. No holds barred...we are sooo close to bringing Frankie home that I can taste it!!
Hope you all are happy and well and trying to stay cool. We had a little reprieve from the heat on Friday when it rained so hard and cooled things down a little. Then the rain stopped and yesterday the heat returned in full force. Hot and sticky....my favorite combination.....yeah, right! LOL!
Thank you all for your continued support, prayers and kind words. My fibro is doing the same, I'm no worse for wear. I still have the horrible leg cramps, but I think they will relax some now that I know Frankie is going to be OK and not require anymore surgery. I was so worried about that. And maybe I can go back to sleeping better, but that may be when he gets home and is with me in the bed again. I miss that!! So keep everything crossed he comes home this coming week. Wouldn't that be just absolutely fantastic??
Big, gentle hugs for everyone,
Until next post,
Missy
Are you sitting down? Ready for some GREAT news? Frankie can eat again!! On Friday he had his NG tube clamped and they started him on clear liquids. Because he doesn't like fruit (but he'll consume sweet and sour chicken like it's going out of style or have oatmeal with raisins but yet he doesn't like fruit!) the clear liquid diet was NOT made with Frankie in mind. They sent up cherry Jell-o, mango ice popcicle, apple juice, chicken broth and coffee. The only thing he liked was the chicken broth, but because he hadn't eaten in a month, it was too rich for him. So he had half of that and my mother-in-law made him some iced tea and he gluggled that down like a man just coming in from a 40 day trek out in the desert!
Yesterday (Saturday), they started him on full liquids since he did really well with keeping everything down from Friday. He had a little bit of nausea, but I think some of it is in his head since he hasn't had food in so long and the previous trials at it failed, his brain could be causing the nausea because its so used to feeling it! The brain is very mysterious! So we got his mind onto other things - his pocket poker game- and he was OK. He also gets nausea meds with his Morphine now. We got him off the Dilaudid (Thank God!) and onto the Morphine. I hope to wean him off of that before he comes home. He can continue the same meds his pain specialist in Scottsdale has him on at home, they worked just fine! He still is in significant pain in his legs still, even though he has been off the Gleevec for a month. Maybe his pain is NOT from the Gleevec. Oh well, that investigation will have to come later. When Frankie gets out of the hospital, we are working on ME next. I want to start the process of getting that lap band so I can start losing weight to feel better and maybe I can work again. Isn't THAT a novel thought? I haven't worked in two years and I'll have to take a nursing refresher course if I don't work in five years. So I have three years to get in tip-top shape!!! So Schranz Boot Camp, here I come!! LOL!!
Back to Frankie...according to the CT scan of Friday night, the hematoma in his abdomen has shrunk some, but not enough to remove the drain yet. At least he will be getting rid of the NG tube. I'll take my camera and get a picture of this milestone. I have all the pictures in a folder called "Frankie's Recovery." I'll even get a picture of him eating dinner tonight; that will be a sight I haven't seen in some time!!!
Well, better get to the hospital to see my man. I need to keep him motivated. Walk. Sit in the chair. Take a short nap. Repeat process. No holds barred...we are sooo close to bringing Frankie home that I can taste it!!
Hope you all are happy and well and trying to stay cool. We had a little reprieve from the heat on Friday when it rained so hard and cooled things down a little. Then the rain stopped and yesterday the heat returned in full force. Hot and sticky....my favorite combination.....yeah, right! LOL!
Thank you all for your continued support, prayers and kind words. My fibro is doing the same, I'm no worse for wear. I still have the horrible leg cramps, but I think they will relax some now that I know Frankie is going to be OK and not require anymore surgery. I was so worried about that. And maybe I can go back to sleeping better, but that may be when he gets home and is with me in the bed again. I miss that!! So keep everything crossed he comes home this coming week. Wouldn't that be just absolutely fantastic??
Big, gentle hugs for everyone,
Until next post,
Missy
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Post-Op Blues
A very tired hello to everyone!
I truly think it is harder on the person who VISITS the patient than the actual patient who gets to lay in those comfy cozy hospital beds....LOL! Today marks the third full day of Frankie's post-op recovery. He's had his ups and downs. At one point, they had him so on cloud nine, if you know what I mean, that not only could he reach for the stars, but he could actually sit on a star! He was on a dilaudid pain pump for awhile and they took it away this morning. He was more alert this afternoon, not so doped up, that he could take a walk around the nurse's station which was the farthest he's gone to date. Then we get back to his room and he always fights with the nurse about wanting to go back to bed and they want him up in the chair. So I chip in and side with the nurse (it's for his own good!) and he sits up in this recliner that's near his bed. I sit in that recliner when he is in bed. For a chair, it's OK. Not the most comfortable I've ever sat in, but I'm not complaining. I can have my feet elevated AND visit with my husband whom I miss very much. It's so quiet at nights without him. And I have so much room in the bed....I'm not used to that! And our kitty baby, Jack lays on Frankie's pillows. I think he misses Frankie, too. I can't wait until he comes home! This trekking out into the 110 degree heat and profuse sweating is for the birds. Next time, I'm going to INSIST that Frankie only have his surgeries in the winter!!
Frankie had to have a blood transfusion today because his hemoglobin went down to the 6 range. This makes his 16th blood transfusion in his life. I kid you not. When he was first diagnosed in 2003, he had 14 units then because he was bleeding faster than what they could put it in. Now, I think it dropped because yesterday they were having some problems with bleeding at the bottom of his incision, near his naval. That has always been a problematic site, especially when he had his last surgery in La Jolla, CA. He was bending over to put on his sneakers and the bottom of the incision split open. We were just packing it with saline gauze and taping a big dressing over it. That is what the nurses are doing right now. His incision line is even longer now, from just below his breastbone all the way down to his naval.
No matter how much I planned things out, by getting sleep and eating right and doing everything I should be doing to prevent a flare-up, I am so neck deep in one right now it's not even funny! My muscles in my right leg (unfortunately I have to drive with that leg and it just kills me to keep my foot on the brake pedal at a stop light) are in an almost constant state of spasm. It hurts so bad it feels like the muscle in my calf are turning upside down in my leg, if that makes any sense. Sometimes it's just my calf, other times it goes into my thigh. I've upped my magnesium intake, as I've heard that helps with fibro spasms so we shall see if that helps. So far, everything I've done for it just isn't enough. I've massaged it, put my myoflex cream on it, taken my pain meds and it's just being stubborn!! It really is hard for me to walk with Frankie because that damn muscle keeps going into spasm. But I paste a smile on my face and off we go around the nurse's station. Frankie and I could do walker races....we look really cute with our walkers, side by side. Quite the couple, he and I! And then when we get back to his room, I coach him on his incentive spirometer and to cough and deep breathe. He always gives me this look that says, "OK, you can leave now" when I turn into "Nurse Ratchett." But I tell him, "hey, you don't want to live here, do you?" The only way out is by walking and preventing pneumonia or some other hospital based infection. And we are still waiting for his colon to wake up and start doing its job. His bowel sounds are very slow right now and he still hasn't passed any gas. Figures! He had NO problem with that at home!!! But now that they have backed off on the narcotics, his colon should come alive. Narcotics can actually make your colon SLOW down and he doesn't need help with that! But you don't want him in so much pain that he can't walk, either. It's such a delicate balance!!!
Today he was pretty good with pain. In fact, he slept so deeply, it was hard to get him awake to do the walks. And then he had some crazy dream of buying a car for $20,000 and only getting a $20.00 rebate! Isn't that nuts? I came home early tonight because when I looked over at him in the hospital bed, sawing some major zzzz's, I thought to myself, "I can sit here in this uncomfortable chair and read my book and watch him sleep, OR I can go home and take a nice shower and eat and get all cozy in my night shirt and stretch out on the bed." Guess what won out? I kissed his check and said good night and he was back asleep within seconds. My poor baby!
I've been feeling a little blue lately. I want to return to work so badly, but I know my body would rebel against me. It's so hard watching the nurses take care of Frankie and doing all that I used to do with such ease. Like changing IV sites or programming the IV pumps and passing out medications. I even miss the charting aspect of the job!!! I can think of all the times when I was working I took it so for granted and thought I'd love it if I could just shuck it all and become a nomad!!! Now I'd give my eyeteeth to be a nurse again. I studied so hard for it and for so long, I can't believe that all I got from my career was 14 lousy years! I HATE all that has happened to me. Yes, I did gain a lot of weight over the years that didn't help my joints or legs, but not all of it was my fault. The fibro and RA have minds of their own. And my back....I could write a hundred years on that and still not have said all I need to say about it! I wish I had a little magic wand to wave over myself and be healed. I'd heal whoever wanted it! Well, anyway, I just have been depressed over seeing all these nice nurses doing a job I loved and here I am, not being able to do it because of my legs and I can't stand for more than five minutes! Will it always be like this? I hope not! I've renewed my nursing license and will have to take a refresher course if I've not worked as a nurse for five years. So I've got three more years to go and I don't want to take a refresher course. So when Frankie is all recovered, I'm going to go in for the bariatric assessment and lap-band procedure (if my insurance will cover it!) and lose so much weight that it will magically take the pressure off the lumbar discs and my nerve roots for each leg and make it so they aren't compressing anything and I can get off some of the medications and go back to work. How's that for a plan? Hopefully it will work!!!
OK, I'm gonna close and go to bed, so I can get up and start all over again. I feel like I live at that hospital! Get well soon, Frankie, before they really do start putting me to work there....bad back or not!!
God bless you all!
Until next post,
Missy
I truly think it is harder on the person who VISITS the patient than the actual patient who gets to lay in those comfy cozy hospital beds....LOL! Today marks the third full day of Frankie's post-op recovery. He's had his ups and downs. At one point, they had him so on cloud nine, if you know what I mean, that not only could he reach for the stars, but he could actually sit on a star! He was on a dilaudid pain pump for awhile and they took it away this morning. He was more alert this afternoon, not so doped up, that he could take a walk around the nurse's station which was the farthest he's gone to date. Then we get back to his room and he always fights with the nurse about wanting to go back to bed and they want him up in the chair. So I chip in and side with the nurse (it's for his own good!) and he sits up in this recliner that's near his bed. I sit in that recliner when he is in bed. For a chair, it's OK. Not the most comfortable I've ever sat in, but I'm not complaining. I can have my feet elevated AND visit with my husband whom I miss very much. It's so quiet at nights without him. And I have so much room in the bed....I'm not used to that! And our kitty baby, Jack lays on Frankie's pillows. I think he misses Frankie, too. I can't wait until he comes home! This trekking out into the 110 degree heat and profuse sweating is for the birds. Next time, I'm going to INSIST that Frankie only have his surgeries in the winter!!
Frankie had to have a blood transfusion today because his hemoglobin went down to the 6 range. This makes his 16th blood transfusion in his life. I kid you not. When he was first diagnosed in 2003, he had 14 units then because he was bleeding faster than what they could put it in. Now, I think it dropped because yesterday they were having some problems with bleeding at the bottom of his incision, near his naval. That has always been a problematic site, especially when he had his last surgery in La Jolla, CA. He was bending over to put on his sneakers and the bottom of the incision split open. We were just packing it with saline gauze and taping a big dressing over it. That is what the nurses are doing right now. His incision line is even longer now, from just below his breastbone all the way down to his naval.
No matter how much I planned things out, by getting sleep and eating right and doing everything I should be doing to prevent a flare-up, I am so neck deep in one right now it's not even funny! My muscles in my right leg (unfortunately I have to drive with that leg and it just kills me to keep my foot on the brake pedal at a stop light) are in an almost constant state of spasm. It hurts so bad it feels like the muscle in my calf are turning upside down in my leg, if that makes any sense. Sometimes it's just my calf, other times it goes into my thigh. I've upped my magnesium intake, as I've heard that helps with fibro spasms so we shall see if that helps. So far, everything I've done for it just isn't enough. I've massaged it, put my myoflex cream on it, taken my pain meds and it's just being stubborn!! It really is hard for me to walk with Frankie because that damn muscle keeps going into spasm. But I paste a smile on my face and off we go around the nurse's station. Frankie and I could do walker races....we look really cute with our walkers, side by side. Quite the couple, he and I! And then when we get back to his room, I coach him on his incentive spirometer and to cough and deep breathe. He always gives me this look that says, "OK, you can leave now" when I turn into "Nurse Ratchett." But I tell him, "hey, you don't want to live here, do you?" The only way out is by walking and preventing pneumonia or some other hospital based infection. And we are still waiting for his colon to wake up and start doing its job. His bowel sounds are very slow right now and he still hasn't passed any gas. Figures! He had NO problem with that at home!!! But now that they have backed off on the narcotics, his colon should come alive. Narcotics can actually make your colon SLOW down and he doesn't need help with that! But you don't want him in so much pain that he can't walk, either. It's such a delicate balance!!!
Today he was pretty good with pain. In fact, he slept so deeply, it was hard to get him awake to do the walks. And then he had some crazy dream of buying a car for $20,000 and only getting a $20.00 rebate! Isn't that nuts? I came home early tonight because when I looked over at him in the hospital bed, sawing some major zzzz's, I thought to myself, "I can sit here in this uncomfortable chair and read my book and watch him sleep, OR I can go home and take a nice shower and eat and get all cozy in my night shirt and stretch out on the bed." Guess what won out? I kissed his check and said good night and he was back asleep within seconds. My poor baby!
I've been feeling a little blue lately. I want to return to work so badly, but I know my body would rebel against me. It's so hard watching the nurses take care of Frankie and doing all that I used to do with such ease. Like changing IV sites or programming the IV pumps and passing out medications. I even miss the charting aspect of the job!!! I can think of all the times when I was working I took it so for granted and thought I'd love it if I could just shuck it all and become a nomad!!! Now I'd give my eyeteeth to be a nurse again. I studied so hard for it and for so long, I can't believe that all I got from my career was 14 lousy years! I HATE all that has happened to me. Yes, I did gain a lot of weight over the years that didn't help my joints or legs, but not all of it was my fault. The fibro and RA have minds of their own. And my back....I could write a hundred years on that and still not have said all I need to say about it! I wish I had a little magic wand to wave over myself and be healed. I'd heal whoever wanted it! Well, anyway, I just have been depressed over seeing all these nice nurses doing a job I loved and here I am, not being able to do it because of my legs and I can't stand for more than five minutes! Will it always be like this? I hope not! I've renewed my nursing license and will have to take a refresher course if I've not worked as a nurse for five years. So I've got three more years to go and I don't want to take a refresher course. So when Frankie is all recovered, I'm going to go in for the bariatric assessment and lap-band procedure (if my insurance will cover it!) and lose so much weight that it will magically take the pressure off the lumbar discs and my nerve roots for each leg and make it so they aren't compressing anything and I can get off some of the medications and go back to work. How's that for a plan? Hopefully it will work!!!
OK, I'm gonna close and go to bed, so I can get up and start all over again. I feel like I live at that hospital! Get well soon, Frankie, before they really do start putting me to work there....bad back or not!!
God bless you all!
Until next post,
Missy
Friday, May 28, 2010
My 2nd Day As A Lab Rat!
Hello, everyone! Before I begin my blogging, I just want to say a great big THANKS to POLLY on Facebook for helping me with resizing the picture above. I don't know if you noticed it before, but the picture didn't quite fit in the box and the side spilled over the boundary of the box. Now it's just perfect! So again, thank you Polly.
I have met so many neat people on Facebook. Not only have I reconnected with my high school friend Denise and my aunt, uncle and cousins in Texas, I've met a FANTASTIC group of friends we lovingly call "Fibromites." People like me, who know what I'm going through day to day. All the pain, stiffness, frustration over people not believing us, and I've gotten some great tips from my new friends on how to cope with this baffling disease. It brings on its very own set of problems that are impossible to deal with alone - but when I feel overwhelmed or having a bad day, I go to my Facebook clan and I feel so much better!!! And, plus, I have a terrible addiction to Farmville....I can't stop playing it no matter how hard I try!!! Anyway, I highly recommend the support groups available out there on Facebook. They are the BEST!
OK, today was the 2nd part of my stress test and boy, oh boy.....I don't wanna do THAT again! I got to the cardiologist office and they hooked me up to all kinds of gizmos-heart monitor, blood pressure and oxygen monitor, EKG and started an IV in my hand for the administration of the chemical test medication. Within a few seconds, I felt like I was running a marathon and couldn't stop. I felt dizzy, chest pressure, heart pounding, short of breath and my mouth was so incredibly dry my upper lip kept sticking to my front teeth! I couldn't eat or drink or have my medications this morning, so naturally my right leg from the sciatica was killing me. My blood pressure at first was a little high from not taking my blood pressure pills. The medication they gave me took care of that, though, and brought it down low. The tech said all the symptoms I was having are normal with adenosine (the medication used in the test) and would last only four minutes. I cannot believe how LONG four minutes could be! They instructed me to deep breath, in through my nose and out through my mouth and that will help to get me through the test. I wanted to tell them to stop so many times, but then I thought of my mom and how strong she was and went through so many painful procedures, I couldn't let her down by wimping out on one little test because of some side effects! So, Mom, be proud of me....I DID IT! :0)
After the "stress" part of the test was done, I went to the waiting room and had my Sprite and a banana and I could take my pills. Thank God! I waited about an hour and a half and then had to have some more pictures taken of my heart. So back into the tube again for another twenty minutes, while this huge machine rotated over my chest, taking views of my heart from every angle. When that was finished, I could leave. Yay!!! Now all that's left is the sleep study, and I haven't heard a word about that. I called earlier this week on it and my insurance had yet to authorize it. So we shall see. I have mixed feelings about the sleep study....I've heard they don't let you take your night pills and hook you up to a zillion gadgets. I can't sleep with all that stuff on or people looking at me. And I can't sleep for sure without my nightly "fibro cocktail" of sleep medicines. So I won't be too heart-broken if my insurance takes two months to authorize it!! And if I do take the test and it shows sleep apnea or something, the treatment for that is CPAP and I just don't think I can sleep with a mask over my face. My friends tell me that it's no big deal and if I can finally get a good night's sleep, it will be worth it. They are right, as I haven't had a good night's sleep since my back and leg started getting really bad with the pinched nerves in my lower back. My husband does say I snore sometimes, but I don't know how he can hear ME when he snores so loudly! Men!
I won't know the results to any of the tests until my follow-up appointment June 11th. I hope everything looks normal so I can have that lap band procedure, lose weight and finally have the corrective surgery on my back. Then maybe, just maybe, I can return to work and make lots of money and my husband and I can travel the world.....ooops, think I'm getting carried away there! If I could just return to work so we could move out of my in-law's house, that would be good. They have been very kind in sharing their house with us for the past two years but it's time we moved on. They have a beautiful Winnebago motor home that beckons them to hit the open road!! And I don't blame them for wanting to travel and have fun. They had long working years and raising three kids and my mother-in-law has had juvenile rheumatoid arthritis since she was 12 years old. So of course they should have fun!! And not have to worry about and take care of us. I think my husband and I have come a long way since my mom died. We are more clear- headed and can take on challenges and responsibilities without too much of a panic!! When my mom was alive, she took care of everything for us and my dad, so we never really learned the basics....cooking, taking care of a home, managing finances...she "babied" us so much and then when she died, it was like, "what are we gonna do now?" Well, we are going to live the best way we know how. I have learned that in the almost two years that she has been gone. My dad is learning it, too, as in Michigan he has a new apartment and is going to learn the hard way about taking care of himself AND the apartment and try not to be evicted the first month he moves in!!
Well, I better get ready to go with my husband to his surgeon appointment and see what the game plan is with this new growth in his intestine. I hope and pray it's only that and they can remove it cleanly. We've had enough tragedy to last us a lifetime!!
Stay happy, healthy & safe, everyone!
Until next post,
Missy
I have met so many neat people on Facebook. Not only have I reconnected with my high school friend Denise and my aunt, uncle and cousins in Texas, I've met a FANTASTIC group of friends we lovingly call "Fibromites." People like me, who know what I'm going through day to day. All the pain, stiffness, frustration over people not believing us, and I've gotten some great tips from my new friends on how to cope with this baffling disease. It brings on its very own set of problems that are impossible to deal with alone - but when I feel overwhelmed or having a bad day, I go to my Facebook clan and I feel so much better!!! And, plus, I have a terrible addiction to Farmville....I can't stop playing it no matter how hard I try!!! Anyway, I highly recommend the support groups available out there on Facebook. They are the BEST!
OK, today was the 2nd part of my stress test and boy, oh boy.....I don't wanna do THAT again! I got to the cardiologist office and they hooked me up to all kinds of gizmos-heart monitor, blood pressure and oxygen monitor, EKG and started an IV in my hand for the administration of the chemical test medication. Within a few seconds, I felt like I was running a marathon and couldn't stop. I felt dizzy, chest pressure, heart pounding, short of breath and my mouth was so incredibly dry my upper lip kept sticking to my front teeth! I couldn't eat or drink or have my medications this morning, so naturally my right leg from the sciatica was killing me. My blood pressure at first was a little high from not taking my blood pressure pills. The medication they gave me took care of that, though, and brought it down low. The tech said all the symptoms I was having are normal with adenosine (the medication used in the test) and would last only four minutes. I cannot believe how LONG four minutes could be! They instructed me to deep breath, in through my nose and out through my mouth and that will help to get me through the test. I wanted to tell them to stop so many times, but then I thought of my mom and how strong she was and went through so many painful procedures, I couldn't let her down by wimping out on one little test because of some side effects! So, Mom, be proud of me....I DID IT! :0)
After the "stress" part of the test was done, I went to the waiting room and had my Sprite and a banana and I could take my pills. Thank God! I waited about an hour and a half and then had to have some more pictures taken of my heart. So back into the tube again for another twenty minutes, while this huge machine rotated over my chest, taking views of my heart from every angle. When that was finished, I could leave. Yay!!! Now all that's left is the sleep study, and I haven't heard a word about that. I called earlier this week on it and my insurance had yet to authorize it. So we shall see. I have mixed feelings about the sleep study....I've heard they don't let you take your night pills and hook you up to a zillion gadgets. I can't sleep with all that stuff on or people looking at me. And I can't sleep for sure without my nightly "fibro cocktail" of sleep medicines. So I won't be too heart-broken if my insurance takes two months to authorize it!! And if I do take the test and it shows sleep apnea or something, the treatment for that is CPAP and I just don't think I can sleep with a mask over my face. My friends tell me that it's no big deal and if I can finally get a good night's sleep, it will be worth it. They are right, as I haven't had a good night's sleep since my back and leg started getting really bad with the pinched nerves in my lower back. My husband does say I snore sometimes, but I don't know how he can hear ME when he snores so loudly! Men!
I won't know the results to any of the tests until my follow-up appointment June 11th. I hope everything looks normal so I can have that lap band procedure, lose weight and finally have the corrective surgery on my back. Then maybe, just maybe, I can return to work and make lots of money and my husband and I can travel the world.....ooops, think I'm getting carried away there! If I could just return to work so we could move out of my in-law's house, that would be good. They have been very kind in sharing their house with us for the past two years but it's time we moved on. They have a beautiful Winnebago motor home that beckons them to hit the open road!! And I don't blame them for wanting to travel and have fun. They had long working years and raising three kids and my mother-in-law has had juvenile rheumatoid arthritis since she was 12 years old. So of course they should have fun!! And not have to worry about and take care of us. I think my husband and I have come a long way since my mom died. We are more clear- headed and can take on challenges and responsibilities without too much of a panic!! When my mom was alive, she took care of everything for us and my dad, so we never really learned the basics....cooking, taking care of a home, managing finances...she "babied" us so much and then when she died, it was like, "what are we gonna do now?" Well, we are going to live the best way we know how. I have learned that in the almost two years that she has been gone. My dad is learning it, too, as in Michigan he has a new apartment and is going to learn the hard way about taking care of himself AND the apartment and try not to be evicted the first month he moves in!!
Well, I better get ready to go with my husband to his surgeon appointment and see what the game plan is with this new growth in his intestine. I hope and pray it's only that and they can remove it cleanly. We've had enough tragedy to last us a lifetime!!
Stay happy, healthy & safe, everyone!
Until next post,
Missy
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FibromyWHAT? by Melissa Schranz is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.