Ever have one of those days that just stretch into infinity? It goes on and on and on and on and it's like a merry-go-round that you can't ever get off of. Or you are on a bus or subway and say, "this is my stop" and the driver ignores you and zips right past where you want to get off? That's how I feel today...and the day has barely begun.
I woke up to Jack meowing his head off (which he has a really sharp meow when he wants something and it goes straight through my head!) and my right leg just absolutely killing me. I went to walk on it and almost fell. It alternates from pain to numbness within seconds and I really don't know what is worse! With the numbness, then comes that "pins and needles" sensation. I'm using my last two electrodes for my TENS machine (I lost a perfectly good pair as they fell in the toilet yesterday at the hospital!), and they are the really small ones that don't work too well. I can get more tomorrow as its payday for my hubby. Thank goodness! I'll run over to my favorite PT store...Active Forever. Here's my lil' sales pitch...they really do have all kinds of neat stuff. Check out their website: www.activeforever.com. Whatever your poison, they are sure to have it. TENS, pain gels, ice packs, walkers, ect. At the store here in Phoenix, I'm on first name basis with the cashier and she knows all about my hubby and me and we know about her, too. They are so friendly there.
Anyway, back to my morning. I hobbled to the bathroom, then took care of Jack (he wanted food...what else! I'm just a walking bag of Meow Mix) and then hobbled to the computer room. I took my pills and then my husband called with the latest news: his electrolytes went wonky in the middle of the night. They had to give him magnesium and potassium and I guess his heart rhythm was very irregular (he has chronic A-Fib). While they were giving him the medications, his IV came out of the vein and they had a lot of problems restarting it. His veins, I think, are really tired of being poked at so they run and hide when they see the needle coming. Frankie had everyone try it out...and finally one of the charge nurses could get it. But, this morning, the IV came out AGAIN and needed to be restarted. Then he tells me that his hemoglobin is 8.2, lower than what it was yesterday!
It just seems like everywhere I turn, there is another problem I can't fix. I just want my husband back to how he was BEFORE the stupid surgery!!! Or send me off to some tropical island where I can be totally FREE...to have a tsunami come my way, knowing my luck!!
Going back to my analogy above, I wanna tell the bus driver "THIS IS MY STOP. IF YOU DON'T STOP, I WILL HAVE TO DO SOMETHING DRASTIC!!" Like eat a whole cheesecake or go out and shop until I drop. Everything thing I shouldn't do, I want to do!! Okay, deep breath here, calm down......I do feel better getting it out into the open, though. I'm just one very frustrated, exhausted, mystified & depressed wife. I feel for poor Frankie, having gone through what he has gone through this past month. He REALLY has been such a good sport.
I was on the computer checking my email when my husband called me again and said the magic words...."I'm coming home today!" I was like.....hold the phone....total shock. How can he come home with a hemoglobin of 8.2? How's his BP or temp? Will he crash again when we get him home and have that really low blood pressure or high temp? We can't take him home yet! My mother-in-law and I trooped down to the hospital and discussed the situation with his nurse for the day. She said the doctor was satisfied that he was ready to come home and that they don't transfuse until UNDER 8.0. The nurse said his pressures and temps are normal and he will be on one antibiotic and one antifungal (his last CT scan showed a portion of inflamed bowel) medication that should cover a broad range of "bugs." He should be OK is what she said. Well, everything made sense and Frankie does have a doctor appointment a day now...tomorrow he sees his pain specialist, on Wednesday his primary care doctor, on Thursday his surgeon and the following Monday his oncologist/hemotologist. So he and I will be one busy couple, shooting all over Phoenix and Scottsdale!
So Frankie is home now, again, and resting. His vitals are good (Thank God!), we are pushing fluids on him, and he will start his antibiotics with dinner. He still has the JP drain and will have home health come out and check it, but the nurse today gave me a handful of saline flushes and a specimen cup to empty the drain fluids in it. So I'm all set to take care of that drain! Our biggest goal will be to keep him home longer than two days....can we do it? I sure hope so!
I think I will go and join my husband on the bed and take a much needed nap. I am just exhausted, all my energy stores are tapped out. My in-laws are going to Costco to get some B complex vitamins for us to help with our energy and to help build Frankie back up...we hope. We're also going to pump him full of protein rich foods and see if that helps. If you or anyone you know has had anemia and has a suggestion, please float it my way. I'm open to any and all suggestions. And I've been meaning to add that if you have a blog you'd like see listed in my "Cool Blog" section, please tell me your URL and I'd be happy to add it.
Hope this note finds you happy and well.
Until next post,
FibromyWHAT? by Melissa Schranz is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.